


is there no place for me in this big world? (home is far away)

by bckwrds101



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Aftermath of Gun Violence, Alternate Universe - Foster Family, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cheryl Blossom Needs A Support System, Cheryl Blossom Needs a Hug, F/F, Original Character(s), Protective Toni Topaz, She Kinda Has One In This Story, idk what else to tag really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-06-27 22:35:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 36,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19799131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bckwrds101/pseuds/bckwrds101
Summary: “Everyone…” Teresa, the foster mom - Cheryl almost laughs at the thought of having a foster mom, but can’t bring herself to do so -, announces, three days later. Three days after 'the system' tried to find someone to shelter her on the north side. Three days of unsuccessful attempts. “This is Cheryl Blossom.”-After another tragic event in her life, Cheryl finds herself being sheltered on the south side. Here are some brief moments of her life there.-*REPOST*





	1. Chapter 1

Cheryl Blossom doesn’t consider herself a very lucky person. She’s privileged, she knows. But being privileged and being lucky are two different things. So, when a loud noise comes from downstairs, she just knows it will be another chapter of her tragic life.

She hears the chef scream first, then the housecleaner, then she hears her Nana’s caregiver and can’t help but feel her heart clench. But she has no time to dwell on what’s actually going on, because all she can think about is surviving, no mater how much she’d wanted to be dead a few days prior.

Thistlehouse is old and thankfully has vents big enough to fit a person. The Blossom heir barely remembers getting inside, let alone crawling to the exit right above the living room. She sees all the workers sitting on the couch, despair evident on their faces, and Nana Rose sitting on her wheelchair, staring dreamily at the window. Her Nana’s caregiver quickly runs and presses a button under the coffee table. The one that Cheryl knows calls the police right away.

There’s something wrong, Cheryl notices, squinting her eyes to try and get a better view of the room. Penelope’s not there. Then chaos ensues.

“WHERE IS SHE?” Cheryl holds her breath as Penelope Blossom bursts in, a gun in her hand and a deranged look on her face. As if she’s not herself. Although she is, and she’s just showing everyone what she’s really like. Cheryl’s probably the only one to have seen that side of her. “WHERE IS CHERYL?”

No one answers, but Cheryl swears Nana looks up at the living room ceiling with a knowing grin on her face, just right where the vents are. Half-gipsy.

Siren noises reach everyone’s ears and Cheryl sees Penelope’s face contort in panic, before it changes to a soft, contempt expression. The younger Blossom covers her mouth because she knows what’s about to happen before it actually does.

And Cheryl can’t even bring herself to close her eyes as Penelope starts shooting. All she can do is tighten the grip on her mouth not to let out the scream she’s holding in.

-

“Everyone…” Teresa, the foster mom - Cheryl almost laughs at the thought of having a foster mom, but can’t bring herself to do so -, announces, three days later. Three days after 'the system' tried to find someone to shelter her on the north side. Three days of unsuccessful attempts. “This is Cheryl Blossom.”

Cheryl swears she hears a boy mutter “Royalty" under his breath, but she has no time to even glare at him before a pair of skinny arms are wrapped around her and she looks down to see a curly haired child hugging her. Old Cheryl would scream 'Don't touch me, dwarf!' at the top of her lungs and run straight to her room. However, current Cheryl doesn’t even know where her room is, so she can only look down at the girl with a grimace as the child giggles. 

“Welcome home, Cheryl.” She says, a high pitched voice already annoying Cheryl to the core and a smile the redhead can’t help but want to wipe off her face. She’s just lost everything. There’s no such thing as “welcome”, let alone a “home”.Her home was Thornhill, and is now Thistlehouse. Wherever she is at the moment, can barely be called a house.

“Thalia, remember the talk we had about personal space?” Teresa asks, gently, and a pout forms on Thalia’s face as she lets go of Cheryl, walking back to where she was before. A brunette girl wraps an arm around the child and smiles encouragingly at her, then turns her eyes back to Cheryl and glares.

Cheryl glares back, just because there’s nothing else for her to do and the foster mom is talking about chores and schedules. After about a minute of staring, the brunette blinks first and grins.

“You’ve met Thalia. But she likes to be called Fluffball. That one over there…” Teresa motions to the boy sitting on the couch, probably doing his homework. “is Dustin. He goes by Jigsaw.” Cheryl’s nose scrunches at hearing the name and the brunette teen laughs. “Not as scary as the name, don’t worry.”

The redhead can’t help but worry, though. After all she’s been through, the last thing she needs is an eight year old haunted child with a Jigsaw mask asking if she “wants to play a game”. That would be creepy, to say the least.

“The baby is little Luke, we’re not sure how he’ll be called, but we’re guessing Lion or something. He really likes safaris.” The baby stares at her with wide eyes and tries to reach for a lock of her red hair. Cheryl steps back and he can’t reach it anymore. She sees the brunette roll her eyes and the boy by her side scoff. “That's Pedro…”

“Fangs!” The boy corrects, almost cringing at the sound of his real name.

“And the one by his side is Amber…” Teresa continues “She goes by her real name. But maybe you can call her roomie…”

“Roomie.. as in…?” Cheryl can’t help but grimace and raise her eyebrows in confusion. No way. No way!

“Roommates, yes.” Teresa states.

“Sorry, princess. The suites were all occupied.” Amber says, mockingly and Pedro - Fangs - lets out a loud laugh.

-

Amber shows her around Southside High the next morning. Briefly. She gives a speech about how toilets don’t flush and the jingle jangle corner, but Cheryl is far too shocked by the metal detector they’ve first walked into to pay attention to anything else the brunette says.

Soon, she leaves Cheryl to fend for herself as she sees a group of people wearing leather jackets with serpents adorning their backs. She’s one of them. And so is Fangs.

Cheryl thinks of Jason and wonders if those two teenagers living with her knew he was in the basement of the stupid bar all along. If they somehow helped FP Jones mop her twin’s blood.

Her thoughts are disrupted as she looks to the other side of the cafeteria and sees another pack of teens - way scarier looking teens - eyeing her as if she’s fresh meat. She is. So Cheryl turns around and leaves the place before dragging too much attention.

Too late. She finds out two hours later, walking from her Math to her English class.

“New girl!” Someone calls, but Cheryl keeps walking, out of self preservation instinct. Wrong choice, because whoever’s calling grabs a fistful of her hair and pulls it back.

Cheryl holds back a wince as her body is thrown against one of the lockers.

“I’m talking to you.” A girl, a scary looking girl, says. Her tone seems threatening and her face is so close to the redhead she can see all the imperfections on it.

Green hair, but she needs to get her roots done. Smudged lipstick. Crooked eyeliner. Badly done eyebrows. And a big scar from the corner of her left eye to her left ear. Cheryl can’t help but grimace as she sees the girl’s ‘in badly need for maintenance’ teeth.

“Cheryl.” The northsider, ex-northsider, finds it in herself to let out, despite the evident threat she is facing.

The green haired girl grins, not in a good way.

“It doesn’t really matter, princess.” Cheryl sees her smiling as she says that, raising her fists in the air and the redhead can feel what’s coming before it even does. But she doesn’t flinch.

“Cece.” Someone calls and the fist doesn’t reach Cheryl’s face. The girl, Cece, rolls her eyes and turns her head to look back once she hears that voice. An awfully familiar voice, Cheryl muses, but she can’t really see the owner of it, only a short pink haired girl by their side, looking unbothered and slightly bored.

“Do I need to remind you not to punch people in the Serpent’s hallway again?” The pink haired girl asks, arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

Cece lets go of Cheryl’s hair and mumbles the words ‘entitled bitch’ under her breath, before walking away as if she’d never stopped there. And with that, Cheryl is face to face with the owner of the familiar voice she heard.

Jughead Jones.

He nods at her in acknowledgment, but says nothing else as he starts walking again. Cheryl doesn’t feel the need to say anything either, but she holds eye contact with the pink haired girl, since she chooses not to follow her friend right away, eyeing the redhead up and down instead, then raising an eyebrow and going after Jughead.

-

It’s her second Friday in the foster home and Teresa walks inside her room and insists she needs to go out more. Make some friends - since she currently has none and walks in the house with a new bruise from school almost every day -. Cheryl bites back a comeback about how she’d probably be stabbed to death and thrown in any corner of that trashy side of Riverdale if she did go out. The expectant smile on the woman’s face make her swallow that comment and just shake her head.

Amber walks in their shared room five minutes later, seemingly ready to go out. Cheryl can’t help but miss the north side parties. Reggie Mantle always throws the best ones, and the redhead could always count on that to drink her worries off. Only she can’t anymore, because she’s cut contact with every student in Riverdale High, every person on the north side, to be honest.

“Chains is holding a party.” The brunette informs, for what Cheryl doesn’t take her eyes off the ceiling to hum in acknowledgment. “It's not Serpent exclusive.” She continues and the redhead hums again. Amber sighs, almost in defeat. “Toni's asking if you’re coming.”

Cheryl actually looks at the teen next to their bunk bed after that last comment, eyebrows raised and a confused look on her face.

“Who's Toni?” She asks, because she’s heard the names Fangs, Jigsaw, Fluffball, Chains and such too much for the past week or two to know a normal name like Toni would stick in her head, had she heard that before.

“Pussy.” She hears Amber mutter, knowing she’s not talking about the redhead. It’s probably about the Toni person.

Cheryl keeps looking at the Serpent, waiting for her to say something else. Or properly invite her for whatever party that is.

“Are you coming or not?” Amber asks, as if she’s annoyed, although she’s not really, she’s just trying to get Cheryl out of bed.

“Is that an invitation?” Cheryl retorts, looking at her in defiance.

“Is that a yes?” The smile on the brunette’s face makes Cheryl roll her eyes and throw the blanket away from her body.

“Give me ten minutes.” The redhead says, as she jumps from the top bed.

“Make it five, we don’t have all night, princess.” Amber replies, but her statement holds no malice. She’s just teasing and Cheryl knows that.

-

It’s not even that bad of a party. Slightly crowded, given the size of Chains’ house and the amount of people in it. But it’s not the worse Cheryl’s been to.

She expects to be dismissed by Amber as they get there, just like the girl did on her first day of school, and the thought doesn’t even bother her that much. She’s used to being alone. She’d been used to that for a long time now.

However, Amber sticks by her side, grabs them both a drink and starts telling her about all the gossips surrounding the Southside. Not the Serpents, nor the other gang, that Cheryl can’t really remember the name but calls Cece’s gang. The Ghosts?

“Ghoulies.” Amber corrects her when she asks a few minutes later, noticing the absence of any people from that particular group. “They don’t really come to Southside parties.” She explains as Cheryl takes a sip of her drink. Cheap vodka with peach juice, what an amazing combination. “They live in the Southside, but they want nothing to do with Southsiders, being them Serpents or not. They want the land. To themselves. Whoever lives here is not their concern.”

“Assholes.” Cheryl offers and Amber clicks their cups together, in agreement.

“Indeed.”

Cheryl spots Jughead on the other side of the living room, along with Fangs, the pink haired girl she’s seen on her first day and another tall guy, and since Amber’s been talking so much, Cheryl decides to share a somethings about her. She tells her she knew Jughead Jones. She knew him when they’d studied together, at least. He seems to have changed. Her foster sister, then, asks about Riverdale High and what it’s like there. She wants to say it’s just like any other high school, but considering Amber’s only experience with high school is in Southside High, she needs to elaborate further.

“There is the football team…” She starts and sees a grin gracing the other teen’s face.

“Did you date them?” Amber asks in such a playful and friendly manner that makes Cheryl forget they can barely be called friends at this point.

“I don’t play for that team.” Cheryl confides with an eye roll, regret almost immediately hitting her at what she’s just said. At how carefree she just sounded saying that, despite the fact that Amber was the first person she’s ever told. The brunette, however, doesn’t even bat an eyelash at that statement, not being dismissive, but not really seeming to care what Cheryl’s preferences are. As if it didn’t make any difference in the way she sees the redhead. It doesn’t, but Cheryl seems to have a hard time acknowledging that.

“What about cheerleaders?” Amber asks again. “Have you dated any of them?”

Cheryl shakes her head. “That would be unprofessional of me, considering the fact that I was their captain.”

Amber actually chokes on her drink at that statement. That having caused more surprise in her than the one before. “You don’t strike me as the bitchy cheerleading captain.”

“You didn’t know me back then.” The ex-HBIC responds, because her foster sister isn’t wrong. She’s not even close to a shadow of what she was before. But a psycho fucked up family can change anyone from the Head Bitch in Charge to a current punching bag.

Their conversation is cut short when the pink haired girl from Jughead’s circle of friends walks to them with a smile. Amber smiles right away and Cheryl can’t help but grin awkwardly.

“Antoinette Topaz!” Amber calls, cheerfully. In a way that Ginger or Tina would call Cheryl when the three of them were up to something.

“What's up, Amber?” Toni greets and the brunette’s smile widens. Yep, she’s definitely up to something. “And you know it’s just Toni.”

So that’s Toni, Cheryl muses, staring the girl up and down. She’s cute. The pink hair, the flannel mesh aesthetic - not that Cheryl could really say something about her style, given the fact she’s been using Amber’s old sweatshirts and leggings ever since she’s gotten to the Southside, because she was not allowed to go back to Thistlehouse to retrieve her own clothes -, everything screams though gang member and empowered girl.

“Toni, this is Cheryl.” Amber introduced, using a suggestive tone and excitedly mouthing the words ‘NOT STRAIGHT’ to the other Serpent as she wraps an arm around Cheryl’s shoulder to introduce her. “Cheryl, this is Toni.” The brunette girl continues. “The one I was telling you about.”

“The one that asked if I would be here?” Cheryl asked, teasingly, in her past high pitched fake innocent voice.

Toni cleared her throat and took a sip of her own drink to hide the grin and slight blush from her face as Amber looked at the redhead with widen eyes in surprise before letting out a laugh.

“Bitchy cheerleader…” She comments, already walking away, leaving Toni and Cheryl by themselves. “I can see it now.”

All Cheryl and Toni do that night is talk. They talk about Southside High, Riverdale High - Toni comments about a few things Jughead’d told her about the place -, TV shows, movies, books. Every basic topics you need to talk about to befriend someone. Then Amber comes later to say goodbye, way too drunk to go home by herself, and Cheryl, for some reason, decides she’s not okay with leaving her roommate alone in that state. So they exchange numbers and Cheryl leaves, dragging a drunk Amber with her.

On Monday, Amber sits with her at lunch. Cheryl doesn’t even have time to question if it’s genuine or just gratitude for Friday night, when Toni places her tray in front of her and sits down.

“Was your nickname really Bombshell?” The pink haired girl asks and Amber looks at her while trying to suppress a snort.

“You've been asking about me.” Cheryl comments instead, unexpectedly flirty, and hears her foster sister groan by her side. ‘The two of you are making me uncomfortable’ she thinks she hears Amber say, but rolls her eyes as the girl starts stealing french fries from her plate.

“You didn’t answer the question.” Toni points out, the same flirty manner being used.

“Why. I think it’s an appropriate nickname, don’t you?”

“It is, indeed, Bombshell.” Toni smile is charming and it seems like they want the same thing. But Cheryl’s not about to have any expectations on that matter.

-

Cheryl and Toni kiss two days later, in one of the janitor’s closet. Toni says something like “I'd like to take you on a date first, but there’s no way I can resist till we both can go out.” before dragging her to the nearest closet and locking their lips together.

It’s messy at first, and dark, and at some point the redhead has to hold onto Toni for balance because she’s sure she’s gonna trip on a broom or something like that. And the pink haired Serpent holds tighter, just because she likes having Cheryl close to her.

“I'm don’t know what I’m doing…” Cheryl mutters in between kisses. Because after Heather, she’s never had any chances of exploring whatever it was that she wanted. She’s never really kissed anyone she cared about either. Not after Heather, not before Toni.

“Do I look like I do?” Toni retorts, and it’s dark, but she’s sure the shorter teen is smiling really wide.

Cheryl honest to God giggles at the simplicity of it all and thinks about how that’s such a good story to tell their children in the future. So much for not having expectations.

-

Fangs is the first to notice she doesn’t really sleep well at night. He walks in the kitchen at 4am and Cheryl is there, casually reading a book, using her phone's flashlight not to turn the lights on.

They spend the rest of the night silently playing Mortal Kombat in the living room. And, once in a while, when Fangs loses, he lets out a loud complaint, only to widen his eyes and cover his mouth moments later, Cheryl can’t help but cover her own to suppress a laugh.

Two nights later, Amber joins them, grabbing the big bowl of ice cream from the fridge and handing each of them a big spoon. She complains about how lonely the bedroom feels without Cheryl tossing and turning on the top bunk bed. Cheryl rolls her eyes and trows a pillow at her, missing the brunette’s face and hitting a lamp that Fangs is quick to save before it crashes on the ground. Both girls sigh in relief and the three of them debate on what movie they’re going to watch, going for a stupid cartoon in the end.

Teresa finds them all curled up on the couch in the morning. Cheryl's sleeping and hogging all the blankets, using Fangs’ shoulder as a pillow since Amber stole hers in her sleep and the boy looks up at their foster mom with an apologetic smile for the mess of popcorn, ice cream and chocolate, being the only one who actually stayed awake to watch the entire movie.

-

Cheryl has her first flashback on her third week. She doesn’t even know why it happens, really. She hears it every day, the way those students carelessly closes their lockers. The loud sound that echoes each time.

Maybe it’s because she’s had a particularly bad nightmare the night before, maybe she just woke up missing her Nana more than usual. But she’s walking towards her Chemistry class, Toni by her side, as always - Toni always walks her to class now, it doesn’t matter if her own is on the other side of the building -, and an angry student closes his locker forcefully right as she passes him by.

The loud bang scared everyone around, Toni included, but Cheryl was the only one to drop her books and cover her mouth not to scream, the way she’d done when the sound was actually her mother shooting her Nana’s head.

She doesn’t remember Toni dragging her out of the building to a corner outside. She doesn’t remember leaning on the wall and letting the girl help her sit down on the floor. She remembers Penelope’s face as she shot the people that worked in Thistlehouse, her face as she shot Nana Rose, her triumphant expression when she brought the gun to the side of her head and pulled the trigger. That’s all she can remember.

“Cheryl…” She hears Toni’s voice. She feels like she’s underwater and someone is trying to reach her from the surface.

She feels suffocated because she suddenly can’t breathe. And she wants to scream but she can’t because she doesn’t want to be shot like her Nana Rose and like all the workers, so she forces her mouth shut even tighter with her hands.

“Cheryl…” Toni is calling for her and she wants to answer, but if she uncovers her mouth, she’s going to scream and Penelope’s gonna find her and kill her. She doesn’t register that Penelope is already dead and can’t really harm her anymore. Nor Toni tells her that, because she doesn’t know.

They sit outside for a long time. For Cheryl it seems like an eternity, because she can’t breath and the scene of her mother shooting people won’t leave her head and she’s so confused because she hears soothing words coming from Toni, but she can’t really focus solely at them at the moment.

Toni presence helps, though. Her voice grounds Cheryl somehow, letting her know that despite having that awful scene replayed in her head countless times, she’s not there anymore.

“You’re safe!” The moment those words leave Toni’s mouth, Cheryl lets out a loud whine and throws herself into the girl’s arms, seeking for comfort.

Her tears are falling and she’s trying her best to take the breaths as Toni instruct her. In and out. Hold for a few seconds, release for a few more. And it helps, having someone holding her also do.

“You’re back now?” Toni asks after a few minutes, the Blossom girl breaths are almost regular and her tears are nowhere to be seen anymore. Toni’s using her thumb to wipe the remains out of her face.

“I think so.” Cheryl answers, weakly.

“I’m here when… if you want to talk.” The pink haired girl assures and Cheryl can’t help but nod and take a deep breath.

She tells Toni everything. The abuse she’s suffered her entire life by the hands of her parents. Heather. Her brother’s murder. Her father’s ‘suicide’. Her suicide attempt. Thornhill going down in flames. Her mother. The shooting that had just caused her breakdown.

Toni listens to everything attentively. She holds the redhead and caresses her hair. She kisses her forehead, and cheeks, and lips every time Cheryl blames herself for something, or says something along the self-hatred lines. She soothes her with actions and when Cheryl’s done talking, she assures her.

“You're not alone anymore, Cheryl.”

Cheryl wishes she could believe that.

-

Jughead approaches her on her fifth week. He says he’s sorry about Nana Rose and about her mother being just as deranged as her father. He doesn’t use those words, but they mean the same thing. And Cheryl knows he needs something. Because if he’s really sorry, he would have approached her on her first day, or first week at least, not weeks later. Not when she’s settled inside her house, and not having people beat her up at school because she’s always with Toni, or Amber, or even Fangs, when he needs help with his homework.

He says she’s the only one who can help him get FP out of jail. He needs her to forgive the man in court. Cheryl asks for two days so she can think about it.

She talks to Amber in the dead of night, and her foster sister tells her about how much the serpents struggle without their king. She talks to Toni, and her more than friend - they don’t have labels yet - tells her about her uncle, and how FP was always able to keep her safe and with a roof above her head.

Before the second day is over, Betty Cooper knocks on her door and threatens her with the footage of her brother being shot in the head. No greetings or ‘how are you’s, nothing but a blunt blackmail. She texts Jughead saying she’ll do it - she was going to, anyways -, then lays down on her bed and decides to skip school for the next few days.

-

On the first day, Amber calls her until she can’t stay anymore and has to go to class not to miss a World History test. Cheryl says nothing every time she’s called. She just turns around and closes her eyes, waiting for the brunette to go away.

Teresa comes in a few minutes later.

“Cheryl, is everything okay?”

Cheryl doesn't answer, because it’s not okay and she’s not even sure why she’s like that over the fact that Betty Cooper blackmailed her. It’s probably because Betty was the second familiar face she’s seen ever since the tragedy in Thistlehouse, and she curses herself for being stupid enough to think that her cousin would actually look for her seeking anything other than her own personal gain.

It’s probably because Cousin Betty’s friendly visit reminded her that she’s alone. And everyone wants something. And now she has nothing to give, so no one will look for her.

She hates herself for feeling slightly relieved at the sight of Betty Cooper at her doorstep, and for not being able to help feeling disappointed when realizing the blonde didn’t really care about her wellbeing. Why would she, anyways?

“I'm gonna call the school and say you’re sick.” Teresa states, when Cheryl stays silent.

-

On the second day, Amber tries to shake her out of bed. She yells that Cheryl’s being childish and is about to throw water at her when Fangs steps inside and drags her out.

“Leave her alone.” Cheryl hears him say, and the brunette says something unintelligible and walks out of the house, closing the front door with a loud bang.

When Cheryl thinks she’s alone again, she turns and faces the ceiling.

“Tiny was worried about you.” Fangs says from the door. “She was worried yesterday and probably will be today.”

Cheryl doesn’t move and makes no effort to reply. No matter how much she likes Toni, Cheryl is currently unable to do anything that involves bringing herself some joy. She’s barely able to get herself out of bed to go to the bathroom or eat.

And being with Toni is number one on her happy moments list. Not that she has too many.

Later that afternoon, Fluffball sneaks in her room and climbs on her bed. And Cheryl let herself be hugged by the seven year old girl for a few minutes, before turning around and facing the wall again, giving the child her cue to leave. She gets out of the bed, but leaves a bowl of sliced apples and M&M’s for the redhead.

Jigsaw comes in a few minutes later and gives her a folded piece of paper. She waits until the boy leaves the room to open it. It’s a drawing for his a school project, the title is: My Family. There’s Teresa, carrying Luke and holding Fluffball’s hand. By the girl’s side, there’s Fangs wearing his leather jacket. Then there’s Jigsaw, holding Cheryl’s right hand and Amber holding her left.

Cheryl wants to smile, but she simply folds the paper back and keeps it under her pillow.

-

Teresa comes to check on her every day, despite not receiving any answer back from the redhead. She makes sure Cheryl eats the meals she leaves by the bed and checks for her temperature.

Cheryl can’t help but wonder if her mother had ever done that for her, then rolls her eyes at her own stupidity. There’s not a parallel universe in which Penelope Blossom would do something as motherly as that.

-

“If it causes you pain, you shouldn’t do it.” Amber says on the third day of dead silence from Cheryl. They’re both laying in bed and Amber knows Cheryl is awake, because she’s not tossing and turning, or mumbling things in her sleep.

“If I don’t do it, it will cause me even more pain.” Cheryl surprisingly answers, a hint of pain in her voice Amber is not used to hearing.

“What do you mean?” The brunette asks from the lower bed.

Cheryl doesn’t explain, she lets the tears fall freely on her face. No one’s looking, no one cares. She’s alone.

“I was gonna do it anyways.” She lets out, louder and more pained than intended, and a sob leaves her before she can stop herself.

It doesn’t even take Amber ten seconds to climb on the top bed and hold her while she cries, despite not understanding quite well what’s going on.

-

Apparently, Amber tells Toni about what happened. Because on the fourth day, when everyone’s already asleep in their rooms, Cheryl hears her foster sister stand up from her bed and walk out the bedroom. The pink haired girl walks in the room moments later and simply climbs on her bed, laying next to her. Cheryl is facing the wall, but she can feel the weight on the bed and smell Toni’s perfume.

“Hey there, Bombshell.” Toni mutters, carefully, as if Cheryl’s gonna break. Maybe she is.

“Hi, TT.” The redhead breathes out, tears welling up in her eyes for no reason at all.

Toni places her hand on Cheryl’s waist and gently pulls her closer. Cheryl turns around and rests her head on the Serpent’s chest. She lets out a sigh as Toni starts caressing her hair - her extremely tangled hair because she’s barely washed it on the past days, let alone comb or brush it -.

“Remember you have someone on the bottom bed.” Amber whispers for both of them to hear. “Please do not corrupt me, I’m an innocent teen.”

Cheryl finds strength to chuckle at those words, along with Toni, and Amber smiles. Small victories.

“If anything, you’re probably the one corrupting my girlfriend.” Toni retorts, and Cheryl’s heart expand with affection at the pink haired girl’s words.

“Your girlfriend?” Cheryl asks, her voice slightly unsure, as if it was a prank and Toni would walk out on her any minute after saying that word.

“That's what you are, isn’t it?” The way Toni says it, assuring but at the same time softly, makes Cheryl snuggle further into her embrace.

“Yeah. That’s what I am.”

“You're making me nauseous.” They hear Amber complain and Cheryl can only laugh when Toni reaches for a pillow and throws it on the bottom bed.

Small victories. Amber and Toni smile.

-

The fifth day is the day she has to stand in court, talk to a judge and say she forgives FP Jones. At this point, no one’s expecting her to do it.

That’s why everyone’s surprised when she wakes up earlier than Toni and Amber and digs into the latter’s closet, trying to find something slightly formal to wear. She finds a dress and thinks it will do, walking out of the room to take her shower.

Toni wakes up after five minutes, missing the redhead by her side and Amber wakes up at the sound of Jigsaw banging on the bathroom door.

“Cheryl!!!” He whines. “I need to pee!”

“Calm down, Saw. I’m done!” She says, using her nearly forgotten HBIC tone and rolling her eyes as she steps out of the bathroom.

Teresa is the first one to voice she doesn’t really need to go. Fangs drops his bread and looks at Toni and Amber in panic. Both girls can’t help but feel uneasy. About the prospect of not having their king back, yes, but also about how much damage Cheryl going to the court might cause her.

“I'm going.” Cheryl says with an impressive confidence. She can’t really tell Teresa that not going is not an option if she wants the worst chapter of her life closed forever.

So she goes. In someone she doesn't know’s car, Amber driving and Toni on the backseat with her. 

Cheryl is suddenly calm enough during the ride to talk to them about Betty’s visit, and surprisingly trusts them enough to talk about the blackmail. Toni says she’s gonna kill Betty, Amber grips the steering wheel tighter and grits her teeth. Cheryl calms them down and says there’s no need to be aggravated.

She sits in court and tells the judge she forgives FP Jones, going as far as lying to make sure he’s out and Betty won’t use the footage she has against her. She looks at Toni for support and the pink haired girl is staring right at her, giving her an encouraging smile. She looks at Amber and sees her sister - foster sister, she now has to remind herself once in a while - glaring at Betty Cooper from afar.

-

In the end, FP is released from jail and there’s a party at the Wyrm to celebrate. Cheryl is not going and Toni doesn’t really ask her to.

Amber drops her off at home before going to the party. She says she’ll retrieve the flash drive with Betty to make sure Cheryl doesn’t need to look at the blonde’s face again. Cheryl smiles and thanks her before walking inside.

Jigsaw and Fluffball are drawing and Cheryl sits by their side. Fluffball smiles and wraps her tiny arms around her. The redhead smiles back and plays with the girl’s curly brown hair. Jigsaw offers her a paper and she starts drawing with them.

When she’s done, she shows them a copy of the drawing Jigsaw gave her, a better version of his project. Both the kids have their mouths opened in an awe and she rolls her eyes. It’s not even her best work.

“Mommy!” Fluffball calls Teresa, and Cheryl has no urge to remind the girl that the woman was not their real mom anymore. Because that would mean reminding them that they’re not real siblings. “Cheryl’s an artist.”

“It's not my best work.” She says, coyly, when Teresa walks in and looks at the drawing. She knows the older woman is going to make a big deal out of it, and she just wants her not to do so.

“You're talented.” Teresa says, sensing the girl’s discomfort.

“Hell yes, she is!” Jigsaw chimes in and Cheryl lets out a chuckle when Fluffball hits him in the head with a teddy bear and yells “LANGUAGE!”

Teresa rolls her eyes and grabs the drawing, placing it on the refrigerator’s door. Cheryl doesn’t think she should feel so proud of herself for having something placed on a refrigerator’s door. She always found that such a middle class parenting thing. Only now she’s nearly beaming at the mere thought of it. Of someone being proud of her work, enough to display it for everyone to see.

She goes to her room and lies in bed again. Her heart not as heavy as it was the days before.

Fangs tells her they’re going to watch Mean Girls that night. No excuses accepted.

“So get your ass out of bed.” She hears Amber scream from the living room and laughs as Fluffball yells “LANGUAGE!” from her own bedroom.

So Cheryl climbs out of bed and meets her foster siblings and Toni in the living room.

They end up watching more than one movie that night.

The pink haired girl has her arm around Cheryl at all times, even when the redhead and Amber start a heated argument about Regina George and how she’s way better than Cady Heron. Toni only laughs and pecks her girlfriend’s forehead, choosing not to voice her disagreement with her.

They watch Mean Girls, of course, then the first Harry Potter movie because it’s Fang’s favorite. After that, Cheryl chooses Freaky Friday. And for the last one, they watch Cheaper by the Dozen, that Toni absolutely loves.

“Can you even imagine? Living with eleven siblings?”Toni wonders out loud.

“Aren’t the Serpents like siblings or something like that?” Cheryl asks, not in disregard for the family environment the gang offers, but just in plain curiosity.

“We are, but I don’t live with eleven of them.” Toni answers with a laugh, and Amber and Fangs nod in agreement. “I can barely imagine myself living with Sweet Pea.”

“At least they don’t need to share a bathroom.” The redhead points out, talking about the kids in the movie.

“Ditto.” Amber says, clicking her hot chocolate mug with Cheryl’s, just like she’d done a few weeks before during the Blossom’s first party since she’d gotten to the Southside.

“Excuse you two!” Fangs raises his voice in complaint. “The two of you are the reason why I have to wake up at five in the morning if I need to use the bathroom before school.”

“Beauty takes time!” Cheryl answers him and Amber hums in agreement.

“Then you need to stay in the bathroom a little longer.” The boy teases and the redhead is about to get up and punch him when Toni chimes in.

“You call my girlfriend ugly one more time and I’ll make sure you’ll need ten years inside a bathroom to fix the damage I’ll do to your face!”

“Ouch, Tiny!” Fangs fakes a pout. “I was just kidding.”

“Protective much?” Amber teases with a laugh and Cheryl just sticks her tongue out at her, snuggling closer to her girlfriend.

“Don't worry baby, our kids won’t have to share a bathroom.” Toni says out loud and Cheryl can’t help but wonder how can she make things sound so simple when she says them. And here Cheryl was, trying to keep herself from having expectations.

“Your kids will leave in a fucking manor, Tiny!” Fangs exclaim, making the redhead roll her eyes and correct him. 

“It's a cottage.”

“A cottage larger than the entire Southside.” He retorts.

Cheryl’s not about to tell him that the Blossom lands are probably larger than the Southside, indeed. So she rolls her eyes again.

“Don’t you ever get a headache from rolling your eyes that much?” Amber asks. “It can’t be good for your health.”

“TT, they’re ganging up on me!” Cheryl complains, using her sweet innocent voice that makes her able to get away with anything she wants.

“That's because we love you, Cher!” Amber says as sweetly as Cheryl, and the redhead has to resist the urge to pat the brunette’s head and say she’s learning well.

“Loving her or not, you better stop teasing my girlfriend!” Toni scolds and Cheryl’s smile grows wider. Not as wide as when she hears the next words. “And there’s no one in this room that loves you more than I do, Bombshell!”

“I love you too, TT.” She says and ignores Amber and Fangs’ “aaaaws" when she reaches for a kiss.

And for the first time in a long time, Cheryl knows she’s not alone.


	2. Chapter 2

Cheryl punches Cece for the first time on her second month there. She’s having a bad week, missing Riverdale High more than she wants to admit, and having a bully harass her every time she’s alone doesn’t help at all. So she breaks the Ghoulie’s nose and walks away.

Amber smiles and pats her back. Fangs offers her a fist bump. Sweet Pea - the new addition to her limited group of friends - raises his eyebrows and looks impressed, a smirk on his face. However, she can’t keep her tears at bay when Toni finds her alone between classes and looks at her with pride.

“I don’t want to be like her.” Cheryl mutters in Toni’s arms. They’re in the bathroom that has no stalls and doesn’t flush, so no one really comes in.

“Baby, you’ve punched that stupid ogre once, she’s been doing that to you every time she’s got the chance, ever since you’ve arrived here. On your first day. I was there, remember?” The serpent soothes, honestly unsure of why is it a big deal. Violence is what she’s known all along. It’s probably what all the Shouthsiders have known their whole lives.

“Not Cece.” The redhead says, in between deep breaths to stop her tears. When Toni stops caressing her hair and shoots her the most confused look, she can’t help but cry more before weakly letting out “Penelope.”

Toni hugs her tighter and lets her cry, realizing violence is something Cheryl’s also known her whole life.

-

Toni comes over more often than not. To the point where there’s a spare toothbrush for her in the bathroom and she has a place on the breakfast table. She says it’s because she misses Cheryl and her family, but the redhead knows better. So does Teresa. Toni’s uncle has been locking her out more since news of her relationship with a girl - a Blossom from all people - reached him.

They share a bed, Cheryl and Toni. And almost every night they have to deal with Amber and one of her stupid jokes.

“Don’t forget I’m down here.”

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t.” Which is not really a good standard, given the fact she’s told Cheryl some things she’s done before.

“I’m an innocent teen, don’t take that away from me.”

All of them laugh, as Cheryl exaggeratedly rolls her eyes, then go to sleep. Cheryl always moves impossibly closer to Toni and the pink haired girl always welcomes her with a kiss on the top of her head. They both sleep better in each other’s arms.

It’s when Amber is away that it complicates. The brunette always gives hints of how Cheryl and Toni need their privacy, and she’s really quick to provide that to them. She goes to Chains’ house to party, sometimes Sweet Pea’s trailer to play stupid videogames, she even goes to Fangs room to spend the night.

So Cheryl and Toni make the most of the time they have to themselves in Cheryl’s bunk bed. Toni knows what to do and the redhead loves it, there’s no denial. Cheryl’s also been learning a lot, making the pink haired girl feel just like she does.

However, as things go further and Toni’s hand reaches the waistband of her shorts, Cheryl can’t help but close her eyes and exhale, being able to hold her tears but unable to hold the way her body shakes. Toni is always kind, she removes her hand and places it on the girl’s waist, then pulls her closer and kisses the top of her head, whispering soothing words.

“It’s okay.” She says, every time. And, every time, that’s when Cheryl lets her tears fall. “You’re okay.”

She’s not ready. And that’s okay.

⁃

There’s a Drag Race that Amber manages to drag her to. Something about Ghoulies, Serpents and territory. Truth is, things haven’t improved as much as everyone thought they would once FP got out, and Jughead’s on his desperate times, desperate measures mode. Last time that happened, Cheryl had to pay the price - even though Betty Cooper was the one to blame for that - , she can only hope this time her friends are not the ones to do so.

Archie Andrews sees her first, cause he’s the first northsider to arrive. He ignores Sweet Pea’s questioning look as he reaches forward and engulfs Cheryl in a hug. Toni’s not around yet and the taller serpent is ready to protect her in case she shows any discomfort. But it’s Archie, the only genuinely good person she’s ever met in the Northside, so Cheryl lets herself be hugged and hugs him back.

“I’m so sorry, Cheryl.” He says, a genuine feeling she wasn’t expecting. “For everything. We should have...” He stops himself, knowing he can’t really speak for everybody in that part of town. “I should have been better, should have been around more.”

“It’s okay.” She answers, offering him a smile. “I’m okay.” She says, because it’s the truth.

Toni arrives and Archie lets her go, a hand still on her shoulder, though. Looking her up and down twice, to try and access if she’s really as okay as she says, then doing the same to Toni, just to make sure she’s being good to Cheryl. He seems convinced.

“We’ll talk later, okay?” He offers and she nods as he walks away.

Toni is quick to wrap her hands around her waist and pull the redhead’s back to meet her front as they both lean on Sweet’s motorcycle. The pink haired girl places a comforting kiss by her earlobe and that makes Cheryl smile.

Her eyes meet Kevin and Veronica’s before the Race is about to start. The latter seems slightly shocked to see her there, in the condition she’s in. Cheryl doesn’t feel like staring back and, when she realizes Veronica is about to open her mouth and call her, or say something, she turns around to meet Toni’s understanding eyes, hugging her close and burying her face in the Serpent’s neck. Whatever it is Cheryl’s feeling, her girlfriend understands.

“Wanna do the honors?” Toni asks Amber as the girl places herself on their side. Betty Cooper is around and the brunette wants to make sure the blonde will stay away from her sister.

“You sure?” Amber asks, excitedly. She’s never done it before.

“Yep.” Toni nods, half because she’s tired of doing that every race, half because she doesn’t really want to let Cheryl go.

Amber doesn’t need to be told twice as she moves to her place between the cars. Cheryl doesn’t really watch it, too comfortable in Toni’s embrace and not even curious enough to see how those races work.

They only let each other go when they hear the sirens. Running to the pink haired serpent’s motorcycle, she spares Veronica one last look before hopping on the bike and holding on as Toni rides away.

-

Southside High gets shut down. They’re in Sweet Pea’s trailer, eating junk food and trying to wrap their minds around what had just happened. Everyone’s excited, but surprised.

“I'm surprised it wasn’t shut down earlier.” Cheryl comments, distaste in her voice as she scrunches her nose, making her friends laugh.

Cheryl can’t deny she’d grown to love and appreciate southsiders - some of them, at least, the ones important to her - more than she’d ever appreciated the people in the other side of town. To say she hates living in the souhtside is an exaggeration - the place had grown on her, despite it’s obvious issues - . However, Southside High was far from being her favorite place on Earth, and she doesn’t even think she would learn to like or get used to it with time, had it not been shut down.

So, honestly, the fact that the Blossom doesn’t need to go to that place and try to pursue an education is more than relieving. The fact that her friends will now experience a better high school experience is also nice.

Somehow, Cheryl can’t shake away how anxious she feels, nervous to the point of ruining one of Toni’s cropped tops by fidgeting with it so much. No matter how much she knows it’s for the best.

Because with Southside High closed, they’re being sent to Riverdale High. And she’s not sure of how she feels about it.

-

Of course Veronica Lodge sets up a welcome committee. A friendly one, letting the new students know about their schedules, where classes are, the extracurriculars, and so on. She doesn’t really spare a glance to Cheryl, and the redhead can’t really say she’s relieved or disappointed, anyways it’s her fault for standing so far from the group of people she’d once dared to call acquaintances. She stays behind Sweet Pea, his whole body covering her from the looks of the Riverdale High students, and Amber stands by her right side, Toni holds her hand tightly on her left to let her know she’s not alone. She doesn’t really need that reminder anymore, but would never refuse holding her girlfriend’s hand.

Cheryl hears approving hums coming from the serpents surrounding her as they look around, sees Amber eyes shine and notices a small smile Toni’s trying to conceal, maybe for her sake. They are all mesmerized by the facilities, and all they’ve seen is a hallway. Cheryl, then, decides to make it the least about her as possible, wanting to let Amber, Toni, Fangs and even Sweet Pea - although he’s trying her best to brush off his amusement with the school - have the high school experience they deserve, without having to deal with her own existential drama of being back to that place.

It’s weird how much she misses Riverdale High yet wants nothing to do with that place and those people anymore.

“You okay?” Toni whispers, tiptoeing to get closer to her ear. Cheryl holds her hand tighter and nods, still trying to peek over Sweet Pea’s shoulder, avoiding eye contact. It’s not about her, she tells herself. They all deserve what she’s had her entire life and took for granted.

Veronica is looking around, Cheryl sees from behind her friend, and the redhead knows she’s trying to find her, because Jughead is already walking towards Betty and the Lodge definitely doesn’t know anyone else from the Southside. For a quick moment, the Blossom wonders when was it that she started thinking about herself as someone that belonged to the other side of the tracks, but she doesn’t dwell on it too much, because Veronica’s eyes find hers and she has half the mind to avoid eye contact.

It’s not necessary, once a loud noise is heard and everyone looks up to see Reggie Mantle walking down the stairs, his Bulldogs behind him and Tina and Ginger by his side, followed by a few other Vixens. Saved by the bell, Cheryl thinks, not very enthusiastically, knowing what’s probably about to follow. The real welcoming committee.

“Oh my God.” Amber says, under her breath. “Who's that?” She asks, eyes shining with something Cheryl can’t really identify.

“Reggie Mantle. Captain of the Bulldogs. Honestly, everything that's wrong with the Northside in a football player’s body.” Cheryl answers, her eyes never leaving the sight of all those people walking down the stairs. If her life hadn’t changed so drastically, she was probably going to be the one to lead them. A thought she is not exactly proud of, even though it’s true.

“Can I have it?” Amber asks again, excitement in her tone and Toni does her best to hold back a laugh as Cheryl looks at her sister in disgust.

“Absolutely not.” She states, seeing a pout form on the brunette’s face, but rolling her eyes and brushing the other girl’s disappointment off.

“But he’s cute.”

“He's also a douchebag, Amber. You deserve better.”

Amber sighs, but gives in. Not without muttering a heartfelt “But I want him.”

Reggie walks towards Jughead and stops in front of him, the silent threat making Fangs and Sweet Pea move and stand by their leader’s side. With that, Cheryl can no longer hide behind the taller boy and takes a deep breath as Tina and Ginger are the first Vixens to spot her. She sees a gasp leave their mouth, and knows a blush is creeping on her cheeks, but she glares at the two girls nonetheless, as if waiting for them to say something. As if daring them to do so.

Turns out Tina and Ginger are still intimidated by her, the Blossom notices as they avert their eyes. It’s either that or they’re scared of her new affiliations. She's not a Serpent, but she knows they would protect her as if she were. Because she’s Amber and Fangs foster sister, and Amber and Fangs are family. Because she’s really good friends with Sweet Pea, despite all the bickering, and Sweet Pea is family. Because she’s with Toni, and Toni is family, royalty even.

An argument is probably going on between the Serpents and the Bulldogs. However, Cheryl can’t really bother herself to pay attention to petty high school fights. Too focused on controlling her breaths, glaring at whoever thinks about looking at her the wrong way, and wordlessly assuring Toni she’s okay. It’s not about her. Her family deserves the best education Riverdale has to offer.

As expected, Principal Weatherbee appears and tells them all to go to class. The Bulldogs quickly go their ways. And since no one really wants to disobey the higher authority on their first day, the Serpents all line up to grab their schedules with Veronica and Archie. The latter, now that he found Cheryl amongst the crowd, hadn’t stopped smiling at her, trying to offer comfort somehow. Archie Andrews is to good for that godforsaken town.

“Can you grab ours, Amber?” Toni asks, sensing Cheryl’s nervousness as they walk to the table.

With a knowing look, the brunette nods and moves forward. Toni lets Cheryl hold her hand and guide them away from there.

-

Surprisingly, Veronica gives Cheryl a full day before approaching her.

It’s their second day in Riverdale High and the redhead and her group of friends are sitting outside during lunchtime. Sweet Pea says something funny, Amber steals half of Cheryl’s sandwich, and Toni laughs, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend and bringing her closer, to the point where the redhead practically sitting on her lap. Fangs is the one to notice Veronica walking towards them.

“Three o’clock. Lodge Industries heir is approaching.” He states. “With what looks like a boyfriend and a pretty cute boy by her side.”

Archie and Kevin, she tries to tell him, but she’s suddenly without her voice, a lump forming on her throat instead. Toni holds her closer and presses a kiss on her temple.

“Wanna get out of here?” She asks and Cheryl shakes her head. Now that she is back to Riverdale High, Veronica’s presence, just like every other northsider’s, is unavoidable. It’s not like she can ignore them for the rest of her high school years.

To be fair, Veronica is polite enough to greet everyone, introduce herself and ask for their names before asking to talk to Cheryl alone. The redhead knows Toni’s about to protest, so she gently pecks the girl’s lips and stands up, away from the comfort of her girlfriend’s embrace.

_I’ll be fine_. Her eyes try to convey, to what Toni offers her a small smile in return.

-

Veronica apologizes. Profusely. Over and over again. To the point where Cheryl’s almost rolling her eyes in annoyance. She didn’t leave her girlfriend and the best group of friends she’s ever had - her family - to listen to one hundred apologies.

The Blossom can’t help but wonder how many of them are sincere and how many are empty and just being said for the sake of their coexistence, now that she’s back in Riverdale High. She’s not being fair, she knows, because she can see the sincerity in the girl’s eyes, and hear it in her voice.

“I’m sorry you had to go through it alone.” Veronica says and Cheryl’s eyes snap as her face moves up to look at the raven haired girl. She was having her HBIC moment and staring at her nails as Lodge spoke before. But the slight mistake in her speech caused her to look up.

“I wasn’t alone.” She corrects, remembering Teresa, Amber, Toni and Fangs. Then Fluffball, Jigsaw, Leo and, finally, Sweet Pea.

“Right.” Veronica looks at her with a knowing grin, and Cheryl can almost feel like they're slipping into normality again as she offers the girl a sheepish smile. Almost. “The purple colored gemstone. I’m really happy for you.”

“I'm happy as well.” Cheryl says and finds herself suddenly engulfed by a hug.

Veronica is small but her arms are strong, she thinks as she returns it. They are not back to normal yet. Yet. That’s a beginning, at least.

“There’s a spot in the Vixens for you.” The raven haired girl says as they let each other go. “Co-captain.” She continues. “I would give you the full leadership of the team but…”

Cheryl stops her with a raised hand before she can finish the sentence, knowing how uncomfortable the teen looked trying to come up with a gentle way to say the truth. Those privileged Vixens don’t want to be lead by southside scum. They still need her enough to accept her as a co-captain, though.

“Only if Toni and Amber are in as well.” Cheryl bargains, because she wants to give both girls the full high school experience. If they don’t like it, they can quit later.

“That’s a deal, Bombshell.” With a wink, Veronica leaves and Cheryl goes back to her group.

When she tells her girlfriend and sister that they’re going to be cheerleaders, Toni smiles and nods, despite Fangs and Sweet Pea’s teasing, and Amber… Amber beams, radiating joy.

-

Cheryl goes to the Wyrm more frequently now. She never goes anywhere near the basement, and no one can blame her. But the Serpents are studying in Riverdale High now, and to say the educational level there is way higher than Southside High’s is an understatement. So everyone is struggling. Everyone but Cheryl, Jughead and Toni.

Toni works a lot, Jughead is somewhere with his father, plotting something and learning as much as he can from the current king, knowing that the title will be his soon. That causes Cheryl to be on tutor duty, helping everyone with their assignments and homework, giving them tips and answering whatever questions they have.

Granted, it’s an unusual place for a study group. No one seems to mind, though. Hogeye and Byrdie even provide some soda and snacks when the tutoring takes too long. Guess the older Serpents value education more than she’d thought, going to the point of being friendly to a Blossom, if that makes the younger ones succeed in school.

“You're probably one of the best things that’s ever happened in her life, Red.” Byrdie comments one day. When everyone’s taking a break and Toni had just given her some Cherry Cola and walked to the other side of the bar to help FP and Jughead with something.

Cheryl looks at the pink haired girl laughing at something the Serpent King says - she tries her best not to flinch as she sees the man that helped cover up her brother’s murder put a hand on her girlfriend’s shoulder and make a joke. He would never hurt her. She’s family -. The redhead turns around to look at the older woman, that has a beer in her hand and a grin on her face. She’s wrong in so many ways, Cheryl wants to say, but can’t find the voice to say so.

_I might ruin her._ She opens her mouth but it doesn’t come out. _I don’t deserve her._ Once again, nothing.

“She's definitely the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” She says, instead, offering the blonde a small smile despite the sudden tears in her eyes.

-

Veronica, Archie and Kevin make a group chat and add Cheryl and her friends in it. They talk almost every day after school. Cheryl feels like asking about Betty, and why is she not there, but decides against it. The blonde doesn’t come near her anymore, Amber made sure of that.

She thinks of the day her sister confessed that she’d threatened Betty when she grabbed the flash drive back. Thinks about how Toni nodded in approval and fist bumped her. About how safe she felt around those two girls that had become her best friends all of a sudden.

So Cheryl doesn’t ask about Betty. She doesn’t care. Or tries to convince herself she doesn’t. Because Betty is the only blood family she still has, and it hurts that they can’t be civilized, or that she’s always worried that Cooper will try to harm her in someway - after that blackmail episode, she has no doubt Betty does anything to get what she wants -.

“Cher-bear, can you draw me?” The high pitched voice of her younger sister pulls Cheryl out of her thoughts.

“And me!” Jigsaw enters the living room wearing a Batman uniform, making the redhead chuckle as she notices that Fluffball is also wearing a costume. She’s not sure what that’s supposed to be, but it’s a costume.

“So, we have Batman and…” She starts, waiting for the young girl to finish.

“The first ballerina of Saturn’s Ballet Theater.” The little girl answers with a proud smile, showing two empty spots where her front teeth should be.

Jigsaw rolls his eyes but says nothing while Cheryl smiles back at her and grabs a paper and a pencil from the coffee table.

“Okay, but you’ll have to be really still for a few moments.” She warns and both her siblings let out excited yelps as they run and get into their position, posing with wide smiles and weird costumes. Cheryl can’t hide her smile the entire time she draws them.

Why was she even thinking about the importance of blood family, anyways? She can’t really remember.

-

A fight breaks down one night. They’re walking to their house, knowing Teresa, Fluffball and Jigsaw are waiting for them to eat dinner - Leo is probably already sleeping -, when they get jumped by a few Ghoulies. Five or six, Cheryl can’t count really well, not with the way her heart is beating fast.

There’s Toni, Amber, Fangs and Cheryl. She can count enough to know they're outnumbered, though.

“Cheryl.” Fangs is the first to say, cautiously looking at the guys surrounding them. “Go.”

If she goes, they’re gonna be even more outnumbered. She knows that.

Toni tries to shield her as best as she can, reaching a protective arm in front of her body and pulling her closer. Until Cheryl’s body is behind her, safe enough to leave the fight without anyone chasing her, she doesn’t wear a jacket, she’s not a target. She will be safe.

“No.” The Blossom states, trying not to show her fear. Moving herself from behind Toni to stand by her side, between her and Amber.

“Cher…” Both her sister and her girlfriend say at the same time, the same warning tone leaving their mouths.

“I won’t leave you alone.” She says before they can tell her to go again. It’s not happening.

Honestly, she has no idea what happened. It’s like her mind went blank the minute she said those words and the Ghoulies attacked. She remembers throwing a few punches, someone’s blood on her hands, then being on the floor, the left side of her face hurting and a guy towering over her with curled fists.

Oh, how she misses Cece.

Then the guy’s gone, Sweet Pea is pulling her up as Jughead, Chains and PB - acronym for Punching Bag, believe it or not - help the others. She looks around and her eyes meet Toni’s first, something shining on them. The same look the pink haired girl had given her when Cheryl broke Cece’s nose. Pride.

They go back to the Wyrm and Hogeye knows better than to call Toni’s uncle, so he calls Teresa instead, handing the phone so the redhead can talk to her foster mom - Cheryl can hear the woman's distress and tries her best to calm her down -.

“We're all alive.” It’s the best answer she can give. Because, honestly, Amber probably has some broken ribs, Fangs eyebrow hasn’t stopped bleeding yet and Toni might have fractured her wrist. So saying they were absolutely fine would be a complete lie.

Their foster mom lets out a relieved breath and something that resembles a sob. Was she crying? Because they got hurt?

“I'm sorry.” Cheryl finds herself letting out in a small voice. “Please, don’t cry.”

“I'm just really glad you’re okay, honey.” Teresa says, relief evident in her voice, despite the tears falling from her eyes.

The Blossom can’t help but try to remember if Penelope Blossom had ever shed a tear for her. If her biological mother had once worried so much about her to the point of crying in relief after knowing she was alright. Cheryl sighs sadly and the thought that, had her been alive, Penelope Blossom would be crying in sadness and disappointment over that fact.

She hangs up the phone with the promise that they will be careful. That Sweet Pea will drive them to their home later, after they’re all patched up and their younger siblings are asleep. She doesn’t want to scare the little ones with reality more than they already have to witness.

FP approaches her for the first time that night. He hasn’t done it before, not even to thank her for what she did at court, knowing she was not gonna like to hear it. She really wasn’t. The soon to be retired Serpent King has an ice pack in his hands, one that she really wants to use to ice her bruised face.

Before Cheryl can be proud enough to decline his help, before she can even open her mouth, really, he speaks.

“You should be one of us, kid."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> So, this was supposed to be a oneshot (I think I've mentioned that when I posted this story the first time)... then I wrote chapter 2 and now here's chapter 3 so... uh... I'm not quite sure what's going on lol  
> Anyways, I hope you like it!  
> I'm back to Twitter now :) @bckwrds101  
> Bye!

Cheryl doesn’t accept the offer to be a Serpent right away. Of course not.

She tells Teresa and Amber, wanting their opinion as well. She mentions it when it’s only the three of them at the breakfast table, and no children around. Amber is clearly excited and extremely supportive.

Teresa has mixed feelings about it, but says she’ll support Cheryl no matter what. So Cheryl takes that as a ‘she's not going to be beaten up to death, or shot in the head, or expelled from home’ in case she joins. Which is already a good thing.

She talks to Toni, obviously.

“I’m going to fail at it.” She says, then Toni looks away from the living room TV and shoots her a confused look. “Being a Serpent. I’ll fail.”

“It’s trial an error, babe.” Toni says, as if it’s the most simple thing in the world. “Trial and error.” She repeats, dismissively, looking back to the TV. There’s a Chicago PD marathon going on and it’s clear where her interests lay at the moment.

Cheryl munches on a chocolate bar, pondering those words. She figures it’s Toni’s way of saying they sometimes beat others up and sometimes are the ones beaten up. Snorting, she crosses her arms in annoyance. Was that supposed to be comforting?

A gunshot is heard from the TV and Cheryl flinches faster than she can stop herself, her heartbeat racing two hundred miles an hour. She hopes Toni doesn’t notice. Of course Toni does. The pink haired girl pulls her closer, to the point where Cheryl can hear her heart beat and brushes her lips on her temple, grabbing the remote from the coffee table and turning the TV off right away.

“You’re going to miss your marathon.” Cheryl mutters, weakly, her heartbeat still not back to normal, and she barely registers she’s shaking. At least she can still breathe.

“That stupid show? I don’t even like it that much.” Toni brushes off, smiling softly at her, running her hands through red hair.

She’s lying, it’s her favorite show. Cheryl’s known that ever since they’ve properly met. Since the first party they’ve met at. She appreciates the gesture nonetheless.

“Another proof.” She states when her voice feels like it’s not going to break.

“Proof of what?” Toni questions, her hand hasn’t left Cheryl’s curls, and the redhead is not going to offer any protest. She loves it when Toni plays with her hair.

She’s been loving a lot of thing Toni does, lately.

“That I’m not fit to be in a gang.” Cheryl explains, whining like a child, causing Toni to let out a soft chuckle. “Toni.” She says, more serious this time “I broke down when a locker door was closed forcefully near me. I can’t even watch a freaking TV show without jumping at the sound of the gunshot.”

“You do realize that’s not all we do, right?” Toni starts, gentle, but straightforwardly. Explaining it with a certain passion Cheryl’s never seen anyone have. Another thing Toni does that she loves, she talks about her family with so much passion. They’re her legacy, they’re made out of her blood. She may not be the queen, but she’s definitely royalty. “We’re a gang, yes. But the Serpents are more than just gang wars and territory fights. We would die for you, yes, and, by accepting in, we’re hoping you’d do the same, if it ever comes to it. But it’s more than that! It’s about community, about family, about protection.”

Cheryl thinks about those words. About how she’s been helping the Serpent students with their schoolwork. How she’s been trying to give them all the most rewarding high school experience they can get. How she’s learned to think of a group of them as her family. How she fought alongside them against some Ghoulies, and how she would do it all over again to protect those she cares about.

“Still...” There’s this feeling in the back of her mind. “I don’t think I can deal with guns.”

“Then stay away from them.” Toni says, with a humored laugh, placing a peck on the crown of her head. Cheryl snuggles closer, because she loves those little kisses. “Seriously, baby, you’re not compelled to use guns, or fight rival gangs, or go on missions. You do what you’re comfortable with.” Holding the redhead even tighter in assurance, she continues, a fond smile on her face. “And if you’re only comfortable with wrapping presents for our Christmas charity, then that’s all you’ll have to do. We’re a family above it all, love.”

Cheryl’s heart clenches at the nickname.

“It’s nice to have people caring about you.” Cheryl lets out, sounding way more vulnerable than she wants to. But it’s Toni, she can let her guard down with Toni.

Toni hums in approval. The words surely echoing in both their minds. Toni’s uncle never cared about her, he still doesn’t. But she has the Serpents, and they’d do anything for her, to protect her. Cheryl’s parents never cared about her. But she had Jason. Now Jason is gone and she has Toni, Teresa, Amber, Fangs and Sweet Pea to help her deal with hardships. The Serpents, then, protect her by extension.

As if sensing Cheryl is in deep thought, Toni is the one to break the silence.

“Besides, I stay clear of guns as well.”

“Really, TT?” Cheryl looks up, curiosity shining in those lovely doe eyes.

Toni holds her chin and brings her face closer, pulling Cheryl into a gentle kiss, before answering.

“I’m better with knives.” She says, simply, offering the most adorably vicious smile. Cheryl loves it.

-

There’s a party at Reggie Mantle’s house. If there’s one thing Cheryl can say she misses from the northside, it’s Reggie’s parties. Of course she liked it when she was surrounded by cheerleaders as they talked shit about each and every person there, then some of the girls would step away to dance with some Bulldogs and Cheryl would resort to talking shit about them. But she expects this new her to enjoy the experience just as much. And she still likes the idea of drinking half her weight in alcohol, so some things probably never change.

There is animosity between the Serpents and the Bulldogs, of course. It doesn’t, however, stop the southsiders from crashing the party, and the northsiders from offering them cheap beer. It’s a party, they can go back to hate each other the next day at school.

Toni decides she’s going to be the responsible one and drink only one or two drinks, as they see Sweet Pea and Fangs already walking towards the beer-pong table. Cheryl can’t make any promises. Honestly, it’s been fifteen minutes and she’s surprised she hasn’t started drinking yet. Whereas Amber is already nowhere to be found.

“It’s a big house.” Toni comments as if to justify Amber’s absence, handing Cheryl the drink she’s just prepared and taking a sip of her own beer. Cheryl loves Toni’s drinks, loves to see her preparing them, how her eyebrows furrow slightly when she has to pour the vodka on the cup, how she smiles when Cheryl hums in approval.

Cheryl doesn’t really want to think about how the term love easily invades her thoughts every time Toni - and everything she does - comes to her mind. She takes a large swig of her drink instead.

Surprisingly, Tina and Ginger come to meet her at the kitchen, laughing drunkly and telling her the latest gossip. Apparently Moose and Midge had broken up this morning, but were found making out on Reggie’s parents bed. Cheryl makes a comment about how it was obvious both of them wouldn’t be able to be apart for too long, recalling that day in Junior High when Moose cried when they were put in different groups for an English project. The two cheerleaders laugh exaggeratedly, and all but drag her away from Toni and to the living room where the other Vixens are.

Toni offers her a smile when they make eye contact, Cheryl seemingly apologetic for being dragged away. Toni shrugs and turns around to talk to a Serpent near her. Cheryl doesn’t really want to leave her, but for some reason, desperately seeks for the familiarity of being surrounded by Vixens at a party. She was once their queen. The Head Bitch in Charge.

They are all drunk. Cheryl knows that’s probably the reason not a single one of them has objected to her presence. She knows the next day they’ll come back to see each other only during cheer practices, and, even then, maintaining a strictly professional relationship. They’ve never been her friends, they were just as close as she could get from having some. It was still fun hanging out with them. It still is, she realizes, sadly.

“Cheryl, what do you think about Julian? I was thinking about going to Pop’s with him next Saturday.” One of them says, and Cheryl smiles as she drinks from her cup before answering. They still think her opinion is important, at least their drunk selves do.

Cheryl’s a lightweight, doesn’t really mean she doesn’t enjoy drinking and being drunk. If anything, she used to love being able to get drunk so easily in the past, to forget about the awful reality she used to live in, to lose all her senses. That idea has changed, she notices when her head starts spinning a bit. She’s been drinking something Ginger gave her, not as good as what Toni prepared - nothing is as good as whatever Toni does. Never -, and decides she doesn’t want it anymore. She wants Toni.

She also wants to go to the bathroom but doesn’t really remember where it is. Surely, she’s smart, she can find out. It’s Reggie’s house, there used to be a party there almost every weekend, she should’ve known where things are by heart now. She doesn’t.

Second floor, second door on the left. It’s something like that, really. The music is loud and Toni is nowhere to be found, so Cheryl drags herself up the stairs, stumbling a bit.

“Door number one...” She counts, her voice just as slurred as her thoughts are blurry. “Number two.”

That’s not the bathroom, Cheryl realizes as soon as she opens the door and turns the light on. The sight in front of her cause her to sober up instantly.

“Hi, Cher.”

Amber is looking at her from the bed, a blush on her cheeks and a smile on her face. Her sister has her clothes on, at least. Well, most of them. And she looks at Cheryl as if she doesn’t understand the confused look on her face. As if it’s like any other day that she’s laying in bed with a shirtless Reggie Mantle by her side.

“I’m way too drunk for this shit.” Cheryl lets out with a sigh, running her hands through her now probably messy red hair. “Or not drunk enough.” She continues, staring at how Reggie Mantle seems just as embarrassed for being caught as she is surprised to catch them. Amber is the one looking at her shamelessly. “Either way, I’m not prepared.”

Cheryl turns around and walks down the stairs to find Toni. She doesn’t think about what she needed before, all she wants is to get out of there with her girlfriend and go to sleep to try and forget that her sister was in bed with a Bulldog. Everything that's wrong with the Northside in a football player’s body, she had warned Amber on their first day in Riverdale High.

Cheryl fails to remember that she, as well, used to be everything that’s wrong with the Northside in a cheerleader’s body.

They don’t talk about it the next day. Amber acts like nothing’s happened and Cheryl does the same. It’s probably a one time thing, she’s not about to confront her sister about something so unimportant.

-

People talk. Of course they do. They see Cheryl walking along the hallways of Riverdale high and can’t help it. Cheryl just hates it takes too long for her to hear it, only doing that when she’s alone going from one class to another, without her group of friends to distract her from the things they’ve clearly heard before.

She wonders if that’s why Sweet Pea is so loud, and Toni’s constantly tugging her close, and Amber is always glaring at anyone she makes eye contact with, and Fangs is constantly asking her the most random things. Cheryl knows they do that to protect her, she just wants them to be around at all times so she doesn’t hear what people have to say. Their stupid entitled opinion.

Some say she was the one to shoot everyone, including her mother, then, when the police came, she played the victim ‘like she always does’ according to some cheerleader. Clearly the drunken truce during Reggie Mantle’s party was a one time thing. When Midge tries to defend her - nice girl, that Midge - the stupid cheerleader, unbeknownst to Cheryl’s presence near them, reminds her of how she did the same thing about the ‘Jason situation’ and how dramatic she acted.

“My brother was dead. My twin brother. My soulmate! Killed by my father! I’m sorry for feeling it like any human being would.” She wants to walk up to the girl and say. To lash out on her, like old Cheryl would. She decides against it after putting exactly two seconds of thought on that idea, knowing nothing she says can change that ridiculous girl’s mind. That Cheryl is just a heartless monster.

Some even go back to Jason’s murder and accuse her of having a hand on it. Once again proving her that some people don’t really want to believe the truth, or reproduce them, all they want is to create chaos based on mean rumors. Cheryl can’t really blame them, she used to be like that. So she keeps her mouth shut around those students as well, knowing they don’t really care about how much of a lie, and how hurtful to hear, that statement is.

It’s when they call her a coward that hits her. They don’t deny Penelope being the one that caused the shooting, just like some don’t deny Clifford was clearly the one that shot Jason. What they say, however, hurts the most. They mention how Cheryl was the one to help her brother cross SweetWater River, that eventually led him to his own death. So, basically, she’s to blame even though she didn’t pull the trigger. Just like she’s to blame for not doing anything while Penelope had a gun on her hand, pacing around in a scary rage. It doesn’t register in Cheryl’s head that she had no time to do anything, considering how fast things happened.

She’s a coward. She’s a coward because she didn’t help. She’s a coward because others died. She’s a coward because she let them die. She’s a coward because she didn’t die with them as she should have.

Cheryl turns around and walks to the entrance, not minding the looks people are shooting her for ditching.

She’s Southside scum now, of course she’s gonna ditch. She can always hear them say.

It doesn’t register in Cheryl’s mind where she’s headed to, at first. Only realizing it when, half an hour, and countless blisters in her foot, later, she’s standing right in front of The Blossom’s property gate with tears running down her face.

The hidden entrance she and Jason used to sneak in and out of when things got unbearable hadn’t been closed. It seems like it hadn’t really been discovered by the police, actually. So Cheryl is able to get inside her house without any difficulties, having done that so much in the past.

Cheryl walks by Thornhill, or what once it was called that, barely sparing it a glance. Maybe if she hadn’t burned it down... she refuses to go down that spiral, not when she’s already down another one.

Thistlehouse is bigger than she remembers. Either that or she’s just been living in a small house for too long. It looks colder as well, not as homely. Has it ever been, though? Homely? Has Cheryl ever felt at home there as she feels inside her house on the Southside, sharing a room with Amber and a bathroom with so many other people? Once again, she refuses to think about it, because despite everything, Nana Rose was her family as well, no matter how impersonal and creepy that cottage was.

Cheryl doesn’t go in, even though she knows how to do that without having to open the front door. She doesn’t go in because she doesn’t want to see what’s inside, how’s everything there. She thinks about all the blood she saw being shed, wonders if anyone thought about cleaning it before it stained, knows that the house would have to be preserved like that had a trial had to happen.

A trial is never going to happen, because the one to blame is dead. She’d taken the easy way out just like her husband. So there would be no need to preserve the scene for the sake of an investigation, but Cheryl can’t really think of anyone who would bother asking to have it cleaned up, she doesn’t really know how that works.

Either way, she doesn’t go in. She doesn’t leave either, choosing to torture herself over and over with memories of Nana Rose, and Jason, and her parents when they at least wanted to pretend they were all a happy family, then with thoughts and flashes of Jason’s murder, Clifford’s body hanging from a rope inside the barn, Nana Rose’s last glance at her, then sounds of gunshots and blood and Penelope.

It’s barely three in the afternoon when Cheryl sits on the porch’s stairs. It’s almost three in the morning when she leaves.

The lights are on, is the first thing she sees when she gets home. The lights are on and there are way more motorcycles in her yard than it should have been. It’s a fact she should stop and wonder about before walking in, but she’s so tired, so drained, honestly, whatever’s waiting for her inside can’t really be as bad as she feels at the moment.

Her feet hurt, and she should have at least taken her boots off to walk all the way from the north to the southside. She didn’t really think she deserved to be spared the physical pain, no matter how insignificant it was compared to the one she’s feeling inside.

Cheryl barely walks through the door when a body collides with hers. Closing her eyes, she inhales the scent of raspberries and red pepper that she’s grown to love. Toni is shaking against her and her heart is beating so fast that Cheryl doesn’t even protest against how tightly she’s being held.

“I thought I’ve lost you.” She whispers in Cheryl’s ear, and the redhead has half the mind to faintly whisper “I’m right here.” back before she opens her eyes and looks up at all the people in the living room.

Teresa’s walking towards her with tears in her eyes, she sees Amber holding both Jigsaw and Fluffball close as Fangs carries Leo. Sweet Pea is there, he also looks washed with relief at the sight of Cheryl hugging Toni by the door. Byrdie is there, along with Hogeye and FP. Jughead is shoving a piece of cake in his mouth, but looking at her disapprovingly. There are a few other Serpents there as well, some that Cheryl’s only talked to at parties or barbecues.

Toni steps aside and Teresa engulfs her in a hug. She’s shaking as well, but as soon as she holds Cheryl in her arms, she lets out a sob, crying on her shoulder.

“You’re grounded.” Teresa wails, holding her even closer. Cheryl can’t possibly do anything but nod, too overwhelmed by all that commotion in the house. For her.

When her foster mom stops crying, the serpents start walking out the door, giving Cheryl a pat in her shoulder, offering her a smile and saying their goodbyes. Jughead walks by her and rolls his eyes. Sweet Pea hugs her and whispers “Behave” before pecking the crown of her head and leaving. Hogeye comments “Quite a scare you gave us, Blossom” with a dry laugh as he passes by her. “Take care, alright?” Byrdie says, after a long hug. However, nothing strikes the most as FP’s words.

“You have a family now, kid. Don’t make us worry like that.”

Cheryl looks down, but nods nonetheless. She thinks about the jacket she hasn’t accepted yet, about how, even without having accepted it, she’s still cared for. Because Fangs, Amber, Sweet Pea and Toni are serpents, so she’s family by extension. It’s probably more than she’s ever had, but not all she can have. They protect her, she wants to be able to protect them as well. She thinks about the extra weight that jacket will bring to her, her name, her reputation...

It’s worth it.

-

“Heard you’re thinking about being a Serpent.” Reggie Mantle sits on the table by her side in biology, before the teacher arrives in class, stating that as if it were the most simple thing in the world.

The more the day passes, the simpler it becomes, if Cheryl’s being honest.

“And what are your sources?” She asks, unbothered, despite surprised. She’s not about to confirm anything, knowing it could possibly be another rumor people like to spread. She killed her brother, she shot her family, she’s now joining a gang… people in Riverdale High love to talk.

“You know, brunette, kinda short, wavy hair. You share a room, if I’m not mistaken.” He answers, opening his notebook at the same time she opens hers. He’s probably about to copy her homework but who cares. It’s his future he’s throwing away by copying instead of studying, not hers.

“You and Amber still talking?”

Cheryl’s rather surprised to know Reggie and her sister are still a thing. Mostly because she’s been living under the same roof as Amber for far too long to know really well that she’s talked to a different guy every week, ever since they’ve met. And Reggie’s party was, what, two weeks ago? Besides, she knows Reggie just as well as she knows Amber, if not more, since he’s been Jason’s best friend since forever. And Reginald Mantle isn’t one to engage himself in durable relationships, and most definitely not with girls from the other side of the tracks.

“She's cool.” The football player answers with a shrug. Cheryl wants to threaten him, to tell him he better not hurt her sister’s feelings, and that if he does, he’ll pay for it. She also wants to tell him to be careful, because as much as he can hurt Amber, the girl can definitely hurt him.

They’re both players. That doesn’t usually end well.

“You better not try anything funny.” She decides for the threat, setting her priorities straight and realizing she would die before letting anyone hurt her sister. No matter how much of a damage Amber could do as well.

“I won’t, Cher. Chill.” He answers with a wide goofy smile and raises his arms in surrender. “I told you, she’s cool.”

“So was Brittany Smith.” Cheryl rolls her eyes, reminding him of how crushed one of her cheerleaders was after he played with her.

“That was different. I’ve always told Britt what my intentions were, she just decided to ignore them and catch feelings.”

“And what are your intentions with Amber, may I know?” Honestly, that talk was already giving her a headache. She’s not sure why she’s engaging with such conversation with Reggie when she can pretty much wait till she gets home and ask her sister about it.

Only Cheryl does know why she’s tolerating that interaction. Because she doesn’t really have a reply for his first statement. Well, she does, she's just not up to discuss it with Reggie Mantle from all people. And she doesn’t want to deny it either, in case he gets to Amber before her with the wrong message and ruins everything.

If there’s one thing that made Cheryl certain these past few days of tossing and turning on her bed, talking to her friends and family, and pondering about, is that she wants to be a Serpent. She wants to be a part of something. She already has a family, and she’s pretty content with that. But she wants to belong to a community, she wants to give back to all those people that have been supporting her. She just wants more.

Cheryl hopes she’s not being too ambitious. She knows she is, because she already has a family to go back to every day after school, which is more than she could ever ask for. There’s a thin line between being ambitious and being greedy, and Cheryl hopes she’s not crossing it.

“Protective much?” Reggie’s laugh pulls her out of her thoughts, and she just really wants to punch him in the face. For no reason, actually, just because he’s there and he’s annoying and she’s there and she’s annoyed. But his next words take her by surprise and Cheryl has to control herself not to let her jaw hang open. “She knows my intentions with her. I really like her, Cheryl. I don’t want to mess this up.”

Then, the teacher arrives and they have to pay attention to class. It’s better that way, Cheryl has no time to grab the boy by his collar and ask him if he’s really serious and Reggie has no time to ask her again about her joining the Serpents.

-

Another thing Cheryl learns with time is that the permanency in a foster home is provisional. She learns it the worst way, when she’s coming home from cheer practice and sees Teresa talking to another person. Social worker.

Fluffball has been granted parent weekend visitations, and after that, she’ll probably be placed in a permanent home. Her aunt’s decided to take her in.

“I thought this was a permanent home.” Cheryl enquires, when her younger sister comes running into her arms with tears in her eyes. She doesn’t want to leave. Cheryl doesn’t want her to leave either.

“This is a long term placement home.” The social worker explains, coldly, as if she shouldn’t even be bothering to address Cheryl in that conversation. “Doesn’t mean the children have to stay here forever. Not when they can live anywhere else with their real family.”

Cheryl’s about to open her mouth to give that woman an appropriate response when she sees Teresa shooting her a look. That look. The ‘you better not open your mouth or you’re grounded’ look. So the redhead grits her teeth and holds a crying Fluffball tighter.

‘We are her real family.’ She wants to say, but, honestly, would it make any difference?

Three weeks later and they’re sitting on the floor helping the child pack her bags. She’s upset to leave, but seems excited when she tells them about the playground her new house has, about the cute fluffy dog and all the new toys.

“We can get a fucking stray dog too.” Ambers whispers in Cheryl’s ear when Fluffball goes to the living room to get some of her dolls. “And why is she even worried about those stupid dolls when she’ll have all the fucking stupid new toys when she gets there?” The brunette continues, sarcasm dripping from her voice.

When Fluffball comes back, they smile at her as if nothing had been said and help her get the dolls inside the small suitcase she’s taking. Amber is smiling the most, but holding tightly onto Cheryl’s hand on the ground. And Cheryl knows she’s not going to take it well when the little girl leaves.

“Take care, sweetheart.” Cheryl says, holding Fluffball close, afraid to let her go and never see her again. Although she’s gonna live in Greendale, it’s not that far.

“I love you, Cher-bear.” She responds, with tears shining in her eyes that she seems to be trying hard to stop. That break Cheryl’s heart in a million pieces, and she has to take a deep breath before stating “I love you too! To the moon and back!”

Cheryl’s trying to hard to conceal her tears, to seem strong calm and composed, so she doesn’t pay much attention to Amber’s goodbye. All she knows is that the all of them are acting tough in front of each other not to break down.

Fangs and Jigsaw had said their goodbyes earlier, the former being in charge of getting their younger brothers outside of the house, to a playground or something, before Fluffball leaves. To somehow try to spare them.

It’s when Teresa’s car drives along the street and turns right, when both of them know that their forever younger sister will not see them, that their smiles fade, they stop waving and Ambers breaks down. She wails in Cheryl’s arms, to the point where Cheryl has to all but half carry half drag her inside and place her on her bed.

She grabs the makeup wipes from the dresser and starts cleaning Amber’s face as the brunette sobs. Reggie calls her sister during that process, the girl barely answers it with a faint “Hello” before crying her heart out again, this time over the phone, for Reggie Mantle of all people to try and comfort her. When they’re done and hang up, Cheryl receives a text from him.

‘Please take care of her.’ It says. ‘Take care of yourself as well. I’m really sorry, Cher.’

Cheryl politely replies him, saying that she’s already on it, then texts Toni to come over, tell her the door is unlocked, then chooses a random Netflix show on their shared iPad - it was supposed to be for study purposes but oh well - and lays on the bed right by the other girl’s side. Amber doesn’t even pay attention to the screen, clinging on Cheryl for dear life and sobbing in her embrace. Cheryl lets her own tears fall, silently.

When Toni arrives in the bedroom, Amber is already asleep. Cheryl feels soft lips on her forehead and looks up at her girlfriend with a sad smile, one that Toni returns before climbing to the top bed.

On the next day, Cheryl wakes up knowing she’s still not prepared to deal with losses. But they’re going to happen anyways.

-

It should be hard for a Northsider, a selfish rich brat that has probably never been held accountable for anything serious in her life, to memorize those laws and also to understand the unspoken rules. It isn’t. Cheryl’s been along Southside Serpents for so long, that their laws are basically already imprinted in her brain.

She can’t even count the times she’s heard one of them yell out “what is this law?” or “what is that law?" to prove a point, and all of the Serpents around her yelled the answer back in unison. Really, countless times. Once, Fangs even called out the first law - no Serpent stands alone - to have a Serpent go with him to the candy machine, just because he didn’t want to go there alone.

They laughed. He was scolded by Jughead for using it in vain. They still do it whenever the Serpent Prince is not around. Because it’s funny, and they're teens, and, honestly, it’s not blasphemy or anything, Jughead is just fond of the dramatics.

Point is, it should be hard for Cheryl to memorize and recite them in the middle of a circle with Serpents cheering and drinking as FP Jones screams the questions in her face. But it isn’t. She’s calm and collected when she answers, the contrasting between her and those around her, only Toni knowing how nervous she really is - Cheryl had emptied the content of her stomach right before they left for the initiation -, and she plans to keep it that way.

When all the laws are asked and all the answers are given, Cheryl looks to her right side and sees Toni, Fangs, Sweet Pea and Amber nodding approvingly at her as Jughead Jones places a red jacket around her shoulders. He’s not really happy, but she finds it she doesn’t care.

Toni looks at her with such adoration, her eyes shining with pride, that she finds it hard to think about Jughead and all his reservations against her. Cheryl smiles at her, a wide happy smile that is not seen quite often, and it’s only reserved to the special people in her life - during special occasions -, and Toni returns it, cheekily. ‘That's my girl.’ She mouths, only for Cheryl to see, causing Cheryl to blush and roll her eyes in embarrassment.

“In unity, there is strength.” FP yells, a hand on her shoulder and a smile on his face, as soon as she puts her jacket on.

“In unity, there is strength!” Everyone yells back. Including Cheryl.

She’s one of them now.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not even going to say that this was supposed to be a oneshot anymore. Because it was, now it isn't and I'm not sure how many chapters it will have. I'll just keep writing it until I don't have any other ideas lol
> 
> Anyways, hope you enjoy this chapter.
> 
> @bckwrds101 
> 
> TW: mentions of violence, abuse and gunshots.

Toni offers to buy Cheryl a switchblade one night, now that she’s a Serpent. They’re cooking dinner for Fangs, Amber and Sweet Pea. Toni is cooking, actually. Cheryl is just helping with whatever she needs, because out of all her talents, cooking skills is not something she really has.

“I don’t do weapons.” She replies, not even taking her eyes away from the task she has at hand.

Toni hums and kisses her cheek, muttering something about how adorable she looks when she’s focused. Cheryl smiles at that, and looks away from her task for a second to coach Toni into placing a kiss on her lips instead. Her girlfriend easily complies.

“You should.” Sweet Pea offers, from the living room, turning around from his armchair to look at her.

The others are all watching a TV show Cheryl doesn’t really like. They’re waiting for the food to be served, so they can choose a movie for all of them to watch. Cheryl loves it. She didn’t use to have many friends around, she’s not used to having people around her solely for the purpose of hanging out with her, enjoying her company as much as she enjoys theirs.

Cheryl shrugs at his comment, then she almost chops her finger off, trying to cut the chicken in small squared pieces. Toni laughs, grabs her hand and kisses her knuckles, as if a warning for her to be careful.

“Or maybe you shouldn’t.” Sweet Pea says with a tone of finality after his laughter dies down. He turns his attention back to the TV and doesn’t really see Cheryl pouting and Toni flipping him off.

-

It’s a Thursday night when she meets **him**.

She’s helping Paws with his Politics assignment, hearing a sigh and seeing the Serpent roll his eyes every time a question is thrown his way. He answers it nonetheless, and Cheryl’s satisfied.

No one sees the man approaching the table, Cheryl even less. She’s looking down at Paws textbook, checking his answers as the boy makes his way to the restroom.

“Cheryl Blossom, we finally meet.”

Cheryl smells the alcohol before she hears the voice. And she’s quick to stand up, crossing her arms against her chest. He doesn’t scare her, at least that’s what she tries to tell herself. She should have accepted the switchblade.

Thomas Topaz Jr. looks her up and down. Disgustingly, to say the least. He has a smirk on his face and Cheryl’s pretty sure she’s seen him lick his lips. Sinister. She’s about to say something when his eyes stop at her jacket, he looks at it with a scowl.

“I didn’t know they accepted traitors in the Serpents.”

“You’re the traitor here.” Cheryl retorts, that being the first thing she’s ever said to her girlfriend’s uncle, and hopefully the last. She closes her jacket tightly against herself, trying not to show how intimidated she is.

He can’t possibly be calling her a traitor, after all he’s done to Toni. She’s a Blossom, yes, the Blossoms were responsible for the slaughter of the Uktena tribe, yes. But Cheryl has never, and will never, hurt a Serpent, not like her parents did, much less like her ancestors. Thomas Topaz Jr, however, has always hurt a Serpent - the best of them -, if not with his hands, with abusive words and harsh comments. If that’s not treason, hurting one of theirs, Cheryl doesn’t know what is.

Cheryl hates him. He’s a coward. He’s mean. He’s cruel. And she hates him. Him, and the feeling that nothing she does will ever be enough to save her girlfriend from the nightmare she lives in. Even if Toni’s only there twice or three times a week at this point.

“I’m a Serpent by blood.” The man spats, angrily, stepping closer to Cheryl and harshly bringing a hand to her chin.

She has half the mind to push him away, but the other part of her freezes. Her head takes her away to her child days, when Clifford Blossom would grab her chin just as harshly. Speaking the words a child should never have to hear.

_‘You’re not even half the Blossom your brother is, Cheryl. Your mother and I ask ourselves everyday why we didn’t drown you when you were a baby.’_

That’s not something people tell children. But Cheryl got used to it with time, she even believed that after some time. That she wasn’t deserving of being a Blossom, unaware of all the shame that family would bring her in the future.

“You are Northside scum.” Thomas brings her back to the present, forcefully gripping on her chin - it’s going to leave a mark, she knows. She remembers -, his face so close to hers, that Cheryl almost throws up with the smell of cheap alcohol and cigarettes.

Hearing that man, that abusive piece of trash, call her scum is too much for Cheryl. Her eyes turn to fire as she looks into his and spits on his face. He disgusts her.

A shadow of a raised hand can be seen from where her head is, unmoving, gripped by those not gentle fingers. Cheryl prepares herself for the impact she’s been used to her entire life. It doesn’t come. All she feels is the hand slipping from her face as she sees Thomas’ body being pushed away.

Paws is standing in front of her, holding the man’s arm, and looking at him with anger in his eyes. Threateningly. “Don’t touch her.” He yells, and Cheryl’s thankful he’s doing that in her defense, and not at her.

_No serpent stands alone._

Then everything happens too quickly for her to understand. One minute, all the higher ranked Serpents are in the back room for a meeting, and the other Byrdie is by her side. She looks angry. And frustrated.

“You’re not welcome here, Tom.” She speaks, she’s trying to seem collected, knowing Paws is moments away from snatching his own switchblade and making a mess. “You know that.” Cheryl can see a vein pulsing on the older woman’s temple, though. Like she’s trying to be calm, but the moment Thomas pushes too far, she won’t hesitate to let Paws do what he wants.

“I’m a Serpent by blood.” That’s the second time he says that, and Cheryl finds herself growing increasingly bothered by that statement. How dare he?

She’s about to go off at him. To yell at him how disgusting excuse of a human being he is. How he shouldn’t even be able to speak of being a Serpent after all he’s done to Toni, all he still does. Before she can do that, however, Cheryl feels a a hand lacing with hers, she feels sweaty palms and a shaking arm against her body. Toni. Her Toni, trying to put a brave face on, despite how terrified Cheryl knows she is.

“Serpent by blood or not, you better leave.”

No words come out from Cheryl’s mouth as she hears Byrdie retort his statement. Cheryl’s now just desperate not to drag his attention back to her. She doesn’t want Thomas looking at Toni, he shouldn’t have the privilege to do so. Sweet Pea is standing in front of her girlfriend, just like Paws is standing in front of her, protectively, hiding them for those cruel eyes. And Toni’s holding her hand so tightly, Cheryl’s afraid it’s going to break.

“Leave, Tom.”

One command from FP Jones, and Thomas Topaz Jr is snorting and walking out of the door. Cheryl lets out a breath she didn’t know she’s been holding, feeling Toni do the same. All eyes turn to them.

“Did he hurt you?” Hogeye is the first to ask. Serpents look at Cheryl with concerned eyes as she shakes her head.

Seemingly satisfied with her silent answer, they dispel, leaving Cheryl and Toni by themselves. The pink haired girl hasn’t let go of their hands yet, and Cheryl knows she doesn’t plan to do so.

“He touched you.” Toni says, furrowed brows and concern in her eyes, along with concealed tears.

Cheryl doesn’t deny that statement. “Only for a few seconds.” She tries to ease, pulling Toni close to her in a hug. She can feel her girlfriend’s heart beating fast, just like the night she came back from Thistlehouse.

“He shouldn’t even be here.” She replies with a whine, holding Cheryl’s body impossibly close to hers. “I never wanted him to look at you. Let alone touch you.”

“He’s an ass.” Cheryl speaks, soothingly caressing Toni’s pink hair. Toni nods, but says nothing, inhale and exhale soundly in her embrace. “He shouldn’t even be able to come near you.”

“He’s my legal guardian.” The way she says it, breaks Cheryl’s heart.

She’s never heard Toni so resigned, as if nothing could be done to take her away from that situation. Technically, it can’t. But Cheryl’s doesn’t care, she just wants her girlfriend away from that human trash.

“Stay with me.” She speaks, causing Toni to look up at her in confusion.

“I was going to.” Toni replies, tilting her head to the side as Cheryl tucks a lock of pink hair behind her ear. “I always sleep over on Thursdays.”

“I mean, like, forever.” The redhead explains, a blush on her cheeks betraying the false confidence she’s showing. “Don’t go back to that trailer. Sweet Pea and Fangs can go there and grab your stuff.” Toni smiles at the idea, but sighs, sadly. They both know it’s not that simple. It’s not like Cheryl lives by herself, it’s not like she’s the only one that has to approve of that idea. She continues, as if she can read Toni’s thoughts. “Amber loves you, Fangs is your best friend, Jigsaw and Leo are always smiling when you’re around. And Teresa will not mind.”

Cheryl’s right, Teresa doesn’t mind. In fact, she sighs in relieve and engulfs Toni in a hug when they talk to her. She mentions how worried she becomes every night when Toni doesn’t sleep over, and how now she’ll be at ease, knowing the pink haired girl is safe at all times.

They share the top bed everyday now and it’s not the most comfortable they can be. But it’s the safest both of them have been in a while, so there are no complaints to be made.

Cheryl just dreams of her eighteen years of age, and living comfortably in Thistlehouse. Sharing her four-poster bed with the girl she loves.

-

Of course being together 24/7 is bound to bring some disagreements. They don’t really get sick of each other’s presence, but there’s a lot more bickering over the small things. Like when Toni hogs both Cheryl’s blanket and pillow, or when Cheryl spends too long in the shower and forgets that Toni still hasn’t showered yet, using all the hot water.

But those are small disagreements. Not fights. Those are solved in less than two minutes. An apology coming from whoever’s wrong, and the other person is satisfied. Fights usually take a little longer, but there’s no way for them to know that. They haven’t fought yet. Not until that day.

Cheryl’s expected their first fight to be somewhat more meaningful. Not about such a small matter. Only it’s a small slightly hurtful matter.

It all starts when Amber oficializes her relationship with Reggie Mantle. Actually, all she does is sit on the armchair and tell Toni and Cheryl they’re boyfriend and girlfriend now. Cheryl smiles at her, remembering all those weeks ago, before she was even a Serpent, when Reggie told her he really liked Amber. Toni, however, frowns at first, then she rolls her eyes with a snort.

“Never really pegged you for a douchebag type.” She comments with a scrunched nose, causing Amber to cross her arms defensively.

“He’s not that bad.” Cheryl is the first one to speak, softly, and her sister looks at her with gratitude.

Toni frowns and looks at her in confusion. Clearly, she remembers their first day of school, and what Cheryl had said.

“Didn’t you say he was the living representation of everything wrong with the Northside, or something like that?” She asks, sarcastically, and it’s then Cheryl’s time to cross her arms.

“Well, clearly he’s changed.” Cheryl responds, rolling her eyes. She hates when her past statements are used against her. It’s not like everyone stays the same and keeps the same opinion for the rest of their life. Especially not when they’re proven wrong.

“Still, he’s a Northsider.” Toni speaks, and Cheryl just wishes she’s misunderstanding the tone in her voice. It can’t be disgust, right?

Amber clearly senses that conversation is going to lead into something bigger. So she opens her mouth to try to change the subject and stop them from going further, but Cheryl’s not having it.

“So what?” Her voice is one pitch higher than before, and her hands are closed so tightly in fists that nails are digging in their palms.

Cheryl wants to hear Toni’s answer. She needs to hear Toni’s answer. It seems like it’s never enough, she can never feel completely content. Because she knows that if she digs deep, Toni’s going to say something hurtful, but still, she can’t stop herself. No matter how much joy life gives her, Cheryl knows she’s meant to feel pain.

“Honestly, Cheryl?” Toni sighs in frustration, sensing Cheryl’s aggravation. “Is that even important?”

“Girls...” Amber tries to speak, but is quickly cut off by Cheryl again.

“It is, Toni.” She answers, basically ignoring her sister’s presence. Not even acknowledging she’s just interrupted the girl. “So what if Reggie is a Northsider? Amber likes him.”

Love conquers all, right? Or maybe not.

“Amber can do better than a Northsider, Cheryl.” Toni stands up and makes her way to the kitchen, she pushes the hair away from her face in frustration. As if Cheryl’s in the wrong for not understanding. “It’s not about Reggie Mantle himself.”

Cheryl’s not wrong. Actually, she is, about a lot of things. But she refuses to be wrong about that particular matter. It’s not about Amber’s relationship anymore, they both know that Toni’s opinions go beyond a simple football player.

“It’s about the Northside, I know.” Rolling her eyes, Cheryl stands up as well, following her girlfriend. She knows, in the back of her mind, that Toni’s trying to avoid the conversation, that she’s trying to leave so they don’t end up fighting. Cheryl doesn’t care, she needs to hear what she has to say. “What’s wrong with him being a Northsider, Toni?”

“They just don’t care.”

Cheryl raises her eyebrows at that statement. It’s the most evasive one, really. It’s too generic and could mean a lot of things. And it’s easy to retort as well, is not like Southsiders are caring when it comes to certain things either.

It’s obvious, in the back of her mind, that Toni’s talking about more than that. It doesn’t stop her from asking further.

“About what?”

“About anything, Cheryl! Anything at all!” Cheryl has to take a step back when Toni turns around to give her the answer. She’s the most frustrated Cheryl’s ever seen her. And Cheryl’s past shows that frustration usually leads to violence. Apparently, Toni realizes that as well, because she lowers her voice once again, speaking calmly, but not less firmly than before. "They’re just selfish, too wrapped up in their own problems to worry about others.”

“You can’t mean that!” The redhead tries to argue. "Veronica…”

“Is nice and all. But selfish.” With a sigh, the pink haired girl looks at Cheryl, her eyes trying to convey the truth in her words. “You, from all people should know that.”

Veronica is a good friend. She’s trying to be better, at least. And Cheryl knows about that. Okay, the girl had done her wrong a few times. However, she'd also saved Cheryl during one of the darkest periods of her life. Only to leave her and go to a stupid town party afterwards? Yes. Making Cheryl feel like she’s all alone again? Definitely. But thanks to her, Archie Andrews and the Hobo couple, she’s alive. She wouldn’t have met Toni, or her new family, if they hadn’t saved her that day.

Cheryl knows it all, but also knows Toni has the tendency to look into the bigger picture more than into little actions. And the bigger picture for her was that they’ve saved Cheryl, but did nothing afterwards, causing the redhead to deal with whatever she was feeling by herself, and not in the best manner. Thornhill is the burned proof. And that Archie really did show his concern for her when they met at the drag race, but for how long was Cheryl gone before he reached out? Only doing so when she appeared right in front of him.

Besides, the bigger picture, according to Toni, is not just about all they did or didn’t do to Cheryl herself, but about the Southside.

“Even if Veronica had been a good friend for you, and she’s only fixing how shitty she was now, she would still be too wrapped up with her 'Daddy doesn’t like my boyfriend that much’ problems to care about what he’s doing to us.”

Cheryl knows it’s not that true. Veronica cares, Cheryl needs to believe she does. But what does Toni expect from a teen that hasn’t even left high school yet? Cheryl’s just about to ask that, when her girlfriend keeps talking.

"Same with Archie Andrews, too worried about making a good impression with Hiram Lodge that he’s about to do anything to please him, even if he has to come over and tell Jug he can’t help him find out what that greedy ass man plans to do with our lands.”

Archie saved her life. That’s all she can think about. Toni’s not wrong, neither Archie and Veronica are doing anything to help the Southside, but Cheryl refuses to acknowledge that, because she’s not wrong either, she doesn’t see what they can possibly do to help.

“Don't even get me started with Betty Cooper, because that one you know well about.” Toni snorts when Cheryl crosses her arms defensively against her chest. Because despite the things Betty has done to her in the past, that are absolutely not forgiven yet, the girl is Jughead’s girlfriend, and she’s always seen at the Wyrm trying to help him with Southside stuff. “So I’m sorry if I don’t think Reggie Mantle from all people is going to be different. No Northsider is.”

“I’m a Northsider!” The protest comes out of Cheryl’s mouth more forcefully than she intends, she doesn’t even understand why she says it that way. It’s not like she’s ever taken pride in that. Well, she did, in the past, but she doesn’t now.

“You live as Southside scum now, Cher.” Her girlfriend’s eyes soften as she leans against the kitchen counter, unbothered by Cheryl’s protests. She speaks softly, making it clear how obvious her statement is nonetheless.

Once again, she’s not wrong. But Cheryl knows she isn’t either. Toni’s concerns are valid, but also…

“You’re being unfair.” Cheryl looks down as she speak, unable to look her girlfriend in the eyes to proffer that accusation.

“And why, pray tell, do you say that?” Toni’s tone shows annoyance, like Cheryl’s seen her get sometimes at the Wyrm, when a man is being particularly stupid. She’s still leaning on the counter, but her arms are crossed now and Cheryl looks up to see one of her eyebrows raised in defiance.

“It’s not like you care about their problems either.”

“They have what it takes to solve the world's biggest problems.” The girl deadpans, they both know what she’s talking about. "So why would I care?”

“Because money is not the answer to everything.” She answers, thinking about her past self now more than ever.

Cheryl hates confrontations. Scratch that, she loves them, but she hates it when it’s with someone she cares about. She can count in her hands the times she'd fought with Jason, knowing that only the thought of it used to cause her panic. In her mind, a confrontation will push people away, and she can’t have the only people who love her, hating her. That’s probably why she has tears in her eyes, but she refuses to let them fall. She’s not wrong, she knows she’s not. Even though Toni’s right about a few things as well.

“No, but it certainly helps.” Toni says, certainty in her tone, finality as well, as if saying that would end their argument. “And if Northsiders are stupid enough not to know how to use it wisely, it’s not on me.”

“I had money my entire life, it never helped with my problems.” As the last resort, Cheryl states. She knows she shouldn’t keep pushing. She knows what might happen if she does. Still, the redhead doesn’t care.

“Yeah, but your problem wasn’t money.” Scoffing, Toni rolls her eyes when she says that. She doesn’t notice Cheryl’s badly concealed tears. She doesn’t notice Amber’s warning glance. “Your problem was ‘deranged' genes.”

There it is. The inevitable. Cheryl knew, from the beginning, that it was bound to happen. She knew that if she pushed hard enough, Toni would say something that would cause her pain. Still, she didn’t stop. She should have stopped.

Because the truth fucking hurts.

Toni visibly regrets her words as soon as she lets them out. Her instance change, her face falls as she sees the tears Cheryl’s been trying hard to conceal fall. Reaching out with widen eyes, she tries to hold her girlfriend’s hand. Cheryl pulls away.

“Fuck, Cher. I didn’t mean to…” She starts.

“Fuck you, Toni! Fuck you!” Cheryl yells, stepping away from her, almost crashing against Amber, who had stood up during their argument and is now standing behind them, unable to say anything. “You and all your talk about how Northsiders don’t care about the Southside. You and your opinion about my family.”

Toni steps forward, pleadingly, holding her hands in front of her body for Cheryl to take them. There are tears in her eyes as well, but she doesn’t let them fall. She’s fucked up. She knows that. Cheryl knows she knows that. It doesn’t hurt any less.

“You and your wrongful opinions about money and how it’s meant to solve everything in the world. Let me tell you something: you’re delusional!” Her voice is so loud that Leo wakes up from his nap and starts crying, and Amber has to rush out of the living room to take care of him. It’s only Cheryl and Toni now. And despite how comforting her girlfriend’s presence had always been, it doesn’t stop Cheryl from spitting her next words with venom. “Just because people don’t live in a can sized cramped dingy trailer doesn’t mean they don’t have problems. And you’re the selfish one for not acknowledging that. So fuck off.”

After Cheryl storms off to her room, three days pass. And they don’t talk to each other. Toni sleeps in the couch and hangs out with the Serpents at lunch. Cheryl hardly sleeps and finds herself talking to Reggie Mantle, Moose Mason and Chuck Clayton at lunch. Amber must have told Reggie because he’s the one to approach her and ask if she wants to sit with them.

Three long days. And it already seems like forever.

Toni speaks on the third day, after they arrive home from school. Amber is out with Reggie and no one else is home. Cheryl’s preparing herself to take a long and relaxing shower, when Toni follows her to their room.

“I didn’t mean to offend you, Cher.” She says, defeat in her voice. Sounding just as tired as Cheryl feels.

“No, but you meant everything else.” Cheryl responds, dryly, not even sparing her a glance.

Truth be told, after three days of deep thinking, Cheryl isn’t quite sure why she became so aggravated that day. She always knew the Serpents, or Southsiders in general, don't think too highly of Northsiders. And it’s not like she ever cared about that, given the fact that the Northside hasn’t been quite kind with Cheryl, not even when she was part of it. So why would she want to defend something that she doesn’t represent anymore?

However, a Blossom’s pride is just as important as their reputation. That’s what Cheryl’s always heard. And some ideas are just hard to let go. With that being said, she’s not about to be the one to say she’s wrong first. She’ll say it, probably, but not first.

“I did.” With a defeated sigh, she continues. At least Cheryl is listening. "But, Cher... you have to understand. Northside has been dumping on us for years. It’s not like my idea of it was of a nice place full of happy and caring people that want to make the world a better place.”

“It isn’t.”

“What?”

“A place of caring people that want to make the world a better place.” The redhead explains, her voice softening as she turns around and looks at her girlfriend. It’s impossibly hard to be mad at her, Cheryl doesn’t know how she did it for so long. Three days is a long time. “But it’s not full of happy people either. Despite their advantageous monetary conditions.”

“I am aware. I just… dismissed that fact, I suppose.” Toni looks down, embarrassed.

“You’re the kindest and most empathetic person I know, Toni.” Cheryl brings her hand to the girl’s chin and raises her head, causing her to look up. The redhead smiles softly, brushing a thumb against her girlfriend’s cheek before speaking gently. “I think I got aggravated because I didn’t expect you to have that strong of a negative opinion about us…uh, them... the Northside.” It’s harder than Cheryl thought it would be, separating herself from the people from the other side of the tracks, despite how long she’s been living in the Southside. Still, she acknowledges she’s not one of them anymore, didn’t Alice Cooper do something like that? She used to be a Southsider but is now one of the most entitled Northsiders there is. Cheryl’s proud to do the opposite. “But I don’t blame you, it’s not like most of them have good things to say about us.”

Cheryl thinks about the ideas she had of the Southside before she lived there. She thinks about the welcome committee Reggie Mantle set up when they arrived in Riverdale High. She thinks about disgusted glances, snarky comments, prejudiced remarks. And knows it’s not fair that she’s upset about Toni doing the exact same thing some Northsiders do to them on a daily basis.

Toni nods in understanding, not offering any retort to Cheryl’s statement. They were raised in different sides, it’s not like all their ideas about Riverdale and its people can be the same. Not when they come from such different places.

“Us, uh?” The pink haired girl smiles, tentatively nudging Cheryl’s side, for what the redhead offers a giggle.

“You said it, TT. I live amongst Southside scum now.”

A moment of silence passes after that statement, Toni brings Cheryl close to her and hugs her tight. She places a kiss on the girl’s jawline before speaking.

“I didn’t mean to offend your friends... I just...”

“Shush, TT. They have their problems, their problems are far from keeping them concerned about the Southside.” Cheryl says, holding Toni tightly, her eyes still closed due to the comfort that proximity brings her. She’s calmer now. They both are. Cheryl can’t even believe that their first fight started because of Reggie Mantle. "I get it. I just wish you wouldn’t disregard their situation just because ours is not ideal either.”

“I understand, Cher.”

The subject is about to be dropped, when Cheryl remembers something she says. It brings her shame, and she can’t help but think that Toni should hate her for how carelessly and offensively she spoke.

“Also, I’m sorry about what I said…" Fumbling with her words, she tries to get away from the hug. Feeling undeserving of how good it feels to be in Toni’s arms. Toni doesn’t let her go, probably sensing where Cheryl’s head is at. "When I mentioned your trailer...”

Toni dismisses that with a soft laugh, looking at her and smiling gently. She brushes her hand against Cheryl’s soft red hair, and Cheryl melts.

“It’s not like it’s the size of a manor, so, you’re not really lying.”

Just because it’s the truth, doesn’t mean it should have been said. Sometimes, some things are better left unsaid. Especially when the only goal is to hurt others.

“Still, I apologize.”

Toni hums and kisses her lips, offering that as an acceptance to the apology. “So, we’re good now?”

“We are good.” Cheryl confirms.

“Great, because that couch was absolutely killing my back.” Toni lets go of the hug to hold her girlfriend’s hand, dragging her out of the bedroom. “Now let’s just go to the living room. Where we can just watch TV and make out… ops, no, I mean make up.”

Cheryl laughs soundly at that last comment, but offers no resistance when she’s taken to the living room and placed on the couch. Her long relaxing shower will have to wait, but it’s not like she’d rather be anywhere other than her girlfriend’s embrace at the moment.

“Did you just apologize so you could go back to sleeping comfortably in our bed?” She teases, when Toni sits right by her side and pull her closer, holding her. The pink haired girl snorts.

“As if it were possible for me to sleep comfortably when you hog the blankets every night.”

“Last time I checked, you had my blanket AND my pillow the other night.” Cheryl states, trying to pretend she’s mad, but failing miserably when she looks at Toni’s face and she’s the big smile gracing it. The smile she adores. She can’t help but do the same.

“Well, at least I don’t snore…” Toni retorts, and Cheryl opens her mouth in shock before grabbing a random pillow and trying to throw it at her. They’re too close, Toni is able to hold it before the redhead even thinks of attacking.

“I do not do such thing, TT.”

They don’t really talk about Cheryl’s ‘deranged genes’. After all the Blossoms have done, it’s impossible not to consider their mental sanity lacking in some way. Cheryl can’t even blame Toni for saying what she’s said. At this point, Cheryl just hopes to be safe from that Blossom madness.

-

A new girl arrives at the house. Cheryl thinks she looks like a scared cat, those widen eyes, the way she trembles when people get near her. Cheryl only knows she’s called Katya because Teresa introduces her to the family on her first day there.

The girl is nine years old and Cheryl instantly thinks that she would be of great company for Fluffball, but her little sister is no longer with them. That fact still hurts.

It’s only on the fifth day that Cheryl hears her voice.

“Babe, you can’t just skip Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire just because you like the Order of the Phoenix more.” Toni protests, laughing out loud when she launches herself into Cheryl to try and get the remote from the redhead’s hands.

Cheryl laughs as well, hugging the remote close, knowing she’s about to lose that battle. The way Toni’s straddling her makes her lose her focus, the way her girlfriend smiles at her makes her heart hurt with the amount of affection.

“But it’s so boring, TT.” She tries to argue, holding the remote even tighter when Toni leans down to grab it from her hands. “Dumbledore is not even in character...”

Toni’s really close to her now. Their face are millimeters from each others’, and Cheryl can feel Toni’s hot breath on her skin. Especially when the girl lowers her head to place a kiss on her jaw, then another one on her neck, that makes Cheryl exhale sharply and close her eyes.

They haven’t... Cheryl’s just not ready. And Toni understands it. She’s patient and kind. However, she’s also a tease who knows Cheryl’s spots by heart now.

They know there’s no way their first time will be on the living room couch. It doesn’t really stop them from having their completely PG-13 fun there. They can’t help it. And there’s no one home.

Nearly no one... because when Cheryl opens her eyes as Toni leaves a mark on her neck, she sees eyes staring at them from the door.

“Katya.” Cheryl yelps, gently pushing Toni away from her. The pink haired girl looks disoriented for a second, before turning around and seeing the girl.

“Hello, Sweetie.” Toni calls, a friendly smile on her face, as she stands up and walks towards her.

The little girl says nothing, her eyes are still widen - but Cheryl thinks they’ll always be like that, she’s always looked like she was scared of everything and everyone -, but she doesn’t step back. Toni stops in front of her, making her look up to meet the older girl’s eyes.

“Is there anything you want?” Cheryl hears her girlfriend ask, softly, carefully. Caring. “Can we help?”

The girl mutters “Water.” and Toni is quick to smile wider and hold a hand out for her to grab. Cheryl observes as the new foster sister shakily holds the hand Toni offers, and the pink haired girl leads her to the kitchen.

“You don’t need to ask, you know?” Toni says, after the girl is sitting in one of the chairs and a glass of water is already in front of her. “This is your house. You don’t need permission to have a glass of water.”

Katya nods, a small smile grace her features. The first smile Cheryl’s seen from her. She figures if there’s anyone to get people out of their shells, that person is Toni Topaz and all the care and gentleness she shows to everyone in need.

The word LOVE goes through her mind, and Cheryl loses herself in the thoughts of how much she feels it towards Toni. She doesn't even notice that her new foster sister is already running to her room and Toni’s back by her side.

“Kind of creepy, that one.” The redhead states, almost in a whisper. Toni playfully slaps her thighs, for what Cheryl chuckles, sitting down on the couch and bringing the girl’s legs to her lap.

“She must have been through a lot.” Toni comments, a more somber tone, and Cheryl nods in agreement.

“You’re good with people.”

At first, Cheryl was going to say Toni is good with kids, but then she remembered every person she’s seen her girlfriend talk to. From babies to elders. And she realized Toni’s good with everyone. And that’s another thing she adores about her.

“I wanted be like Teresa.” Toni says, with a shrug. “I wanted to help kids and teens like she does.” She explains, brushing her thumb against the back of Cheryl’s hands, now holding hers. “Care for them.”

‘The way no one cared for us.’ She doesn’t need to say that for Cheryl to understand. Because she does, and she knows her situation was not the best when she arrived at her house, but knows it’s not the worst either. Knows there are a lot of people in bad place right now, just like there will be a lot of them in the future.

And Thistlehouse is big. Is not as big as Thornhill but big. Big enough to become a foster home, a shelter for those who need it.

“We can do that.” Cheryl states, seeing the look of pure adoration Toni gives her, after a surprised one.

“We can?” The hope in the pink haired Serpent’s voice is hard to miss.

“Of course we can, T.T”

And it’s looking at her girlfriend, at that moment, seeing the bright smile on her face, that Cheryl knows. For sure. No matter what dreams Toni has, no matter how hard to accomplish they seem, Cheryl’s going to move oceans and mountains to make them true. Toni deserves it. She deserves the world.

-

Being a serpent is not really as difficult as Cheryl thought. She’s been on a couple missions with Toni and Fangs, some more with Sweet Pea and Amber. Nothing major. Spying on some Ghoulies, taking pictures of their illegal affairs, things like that.

So it’s safe to say being a serpent is not that hard. Until it is.

Until they’re walking down the street one day and a gun shot is heard.

Then Toni’s on the ground. An open wound on her abdomen.

Cheryl’s in shock at first. She kneels down by Toni’s side and just stares at it. All the blood.

“Hey.” Toni calls, her voice gentle, despite the pain she obviously feels. Cheryl grabs her blooded hands and starts compressing the wound. “It’s okay, Bombshell.” There are tears running down her face, Cheryl can see it’s not okay. Toni doesn’t really cry much.

Sweet Pea and Jughead run to try and find the culprit, but it’s easy to say it’ll be of no avail. No one saw it, it was too dark, they didn’t see anyone around when it happened. Fangs calls the ambulance while Amber cries for help.

Cheryl looks down at Toni, knowing she’s not prepared for another loss. Knowing she’s never going to be prepared to lose Toni. Knowing her girlfriend is just too young to be gone.

“Don’t you dare, Toni.” She cries, not daring to loosen her hands on the bullet wound, despite how much she’s shaking. “I love you, don’t you dare leave me.”

They've said the L word before, but it's funny how it takes Toni dying on the ground for Cheryl realize how much she means it with all her heart and strength. And how she's never going to feel that for anyone else. Ever.

Toni forces a laugh out of her lips, yelping in pain as soon as she does it. But the smile never leaves her face.

“I love you too, Cheryl Blossom.” Then she closes her eyes and Cheryl’s heart clenches as she lets out an anguished scream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hihihihi I'm about to run away now. BYE
> 
> You can follow me/hate on me on Twitter, if you want.  
> It's @bckwrds101


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> About last chapter: OPS? 
> 
> About this one: I hope you enjoy my attempt at "fixing" things. 
> 
> @bckwrds101
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING: there isn't a specific one, but please read this knowing Cheryl's in a dark place and her mind is just a mess. Like, really. Besides that, there's mentions of blood.

Toni’s recovery is outstandingly fast, according to the doctors. Painfully slow, according to Cheryl.

Five days. Five long days and Toni has yet to open her eyes. The doctors say she’s doing better, considering the circumstances. Circumstances are: Toni should have been dead, but she’s a fighter. They say it’s a good sign that she’s nearly able to breathe on her own, without the need for that stupid ventilator and its noise that drives Cheryl’s crazy. Not as crazy as the noise of the heart rate monitor is driving her.

No, that one is maddening.

She’s memorized its rhythm by now. She knows exactly what noise it does and when it does it. Knows the pitches of its beeps by heart. And she loses herself little by little whenever the sound is different than it should’ve been.

The nurses all but forbid her to call them whenever the beeping goes slightly faster, explaining to her over and over again that Toni’s stable, she’s unconscious but it’s like she’s asleep. Slight alterations are normal. There’s no need to worry.

It’s not like Cheryl doesn’t try to believe that statement. She does. But it’s hard when she’s seen the love of her life slipping into unconsciousness, and death, right in front of her eyes.

That’s what Toni is. The love of her life.

Cheryl’s known she loved Toni as a girlfriend. Just like she’s known she loved Amber, Fangs and everyone else as her family. But she’s just recently realized that Toni’s it for her. Her soulmate, the one she wants to be with for the rest of her life, and beyond. She loves Toni with all her heart, and she knows she’ll be unable to love anyone else that intensely. Toni is it! And Cheryl can’t lose the girl, not when she’s just made peace with that fact.

Toni cannot die. Toni better not die. Cheryl doesn’t know what she’s going to do if that happens. The doctors said it won’t, they said she’s stable and she’s lucky, and that she’s getting better day by day. However, the fact that Cheryl hasn’t seen those improvements scare her. Because all she can think about is the fact that Toni hasn’t opened her eyes once, that she hasn’t heard her girlfriend’s voice in five days, and that she looks just as weak as she was when she arrived at the hospital. So, no. Cheryl can’t see any improvements, but desperately wants to believe in the doctors.

“Cher, you need to eat.” Amber says, for the eighth time that day. The food on the coffee table is intact, and Cheryl barely takes a glance at it before shaking her head.

Toni is not eating. It’s not fair that she gets to eat but Toni doesn’t. It’s not fair that she gets to breathe without the help of machines and Toni doesn’t. Cheryl has felt that way before. Underserving. When Jason died and she more than believed it should have been her. It’s the same with Toni. She would do anything to be in her place, just so Toni could be alive.

_Don’t be ridiculous, Cheryl. She is alive._

Ever since Toni left surgery, Cheryl’s been by her side. She’s been staying in that hospital room twenty-four seven, going as far as taking quick showers in the adjacent bathroom just so she doesn’t need to leave Toni for longer than necessary. And it’s up to one of her family members to go to the hospital and bring her what they think she needs. Clothes, food, pillow, blankets. Anything, really. Honestly, all she needs is for Toni to wake up.

Visiting hours come and go, and Cheryl’s certain most Serpents have been there to see her girlfriend already. She barely acknowledges their presence, too caught up inside her own head that it’s impossible for her to form coherent sentences to make conversation, no matter how hard they try to talk to her. Amber is the one with her that day, keeping her company, holding her as another crying outburst happens.

“She cannot die.” Cheryl repeats, over and over again.

“She won’t, Cher.” Amber assures. “The doctors said she’s okay.”

“She’s not opening her eyes, Amber. She’s not talking, she’s not walking, she’s not smiling.” Cheryl wails, hardly able to breathe. “She’s not okay.”

“She’s alive.” Amber says, a tone of finality somehow easing Cheryl’s mind. She manages to stop herself from crying after five more minutes of sobs and silent hiccups.

Toni’s alive. She’ll open her eyes. She’ll talk. She’ll walk. She’ll smile.

“It takes time.” Amber says.

“It takes time.” Cheryl repeats as a mantra, calmly, as many times as she needs, her eyes unfocused and an annoying buzz in her head getting louder. It must be the lack of sleep.

If Cheryl’s slept for six hours those past five days, it's a lot. She’s used to not sleeping much, terrified of nightmares and haunted by her own thoughts, but it was getting better ever since Toni started sleeping in her bed, holding her, rocking her to sleep whenever a particularly rough nightmare scared Cheryl. Now, without Toni by her side, and with the knowledge that if she closes her eyes even slightly she might not see her girlfriend opening her eyes, or worse, she might not hear erratic alterations in the heart rate monitor, and only wake up to the sound of a flat line beep.

So all she’s been doing is the bare minimum to stay alive and wait for Toni to come back. She sleeps just enough to try and deceive her mind that she’s rested, she eats just as much as she needs not to starve to death, she takes a shower just enough for her to feel clean, or as clean as she can feel. Because no matter how much she tries, it’s impossible to wash the blood she sees in her hands when she looks at them.

Sometimes it’s there, when she glances at them accidentally, sometimes it isn’t, when Teresa holds them tightly to show support. Still, the image is still imprinted on her brain. Toni’s eyes closing as Cheryl’s bloody hands try to compress the bullet wound on her abdomen.

-

Two days later, the doctors take Toni out of the oxygen machine, placing only an oxygen tube on the girl’s nose. And Cheryl holds her own breath waiting for Toni to inhale and exhale on her own. She quickly does so, and if Cheryl breaks down in relieved sobs, no one can blame her.

Cheryl’s only going to believe Toni’s not going to die when she sees her girlfriend opening her eyes and talking to her. She refuses to let herself believe everything’s fine, only to fall into an even bigger spiral when it doesn’t.

It’s late evening and visiting hours are over. Which means Cheryl is alone in the room with an unconscious but stable Toni. Which means she should be doing something to occupy her mind, like homework. School has been the last priority Cheryl has at the moment. She doesn’t, homework can wait.

Instead, the redhead stares into the heart rate monitor. She stares and stares and stares. Her eyes feel heavy, but Cheryl doesn’t let them close. The buzz in her ears gets even louder than it normally is.

A shadow stops by the door, and the girl looks at the clock above Toni’s bed to check if it’s already time for the last medicine of the day.

She has them memorized, of course. According to the time they have to be applied, the order of application, the dose, the possible effects Toni would feel had she been awake. Cheryl knows it all.

That’s why she knows it’s not the time yet. There are exactly forty seven minutes left. So, obviously, the nurse is early. The night nurses are always changing, that one must have gotten the time wrong.

When Cheryl turns to speak to her, however, she freezes. And blinks once, twice, three times. It doesn’t disappear. **She** doesn’t disappear.

Penelope Blossom stands at the door, a wicked smile on her face, blood all over her and a gun in her hand. The woman nods her head to the bed where Toni’s laying on. And pulls the trigger.

The gun doesn’t even make a sound. But when Cheryl looks back at Toni, she’s bleeding. Again. On the exact same spot the bullet wounded her a week ago. Cheryl looks back at the door and Penelope is gone. And she’s frozen in her place, seeing her girlfriend die but not being able to move.

Cheryl looks down at her hands and they’re covered in blood. Toni’s blood.

All she can do is scream.

Then everything goes black.

-

Cheryl wakes up four hours later. Teresa is by her side, holding her hand. She realizes that’s not Toni’s room, and she is the one lying on a hospital bed.

“Toni...” She tries sits up, quickly, realizing her girlfriend is not there. Realizing she’s not by Toni’s side.

_Toni is dying._

“Easy, sweetheart.” Teresa soothes, holding Cheryl’s shoulders back on the bed. “She’s fine. Toni’s fine.”

“She’s dying.” Cheryl whispers, desperate tears in her eyes. Toni is dying and Cheryl can’t believe she’s luxuriously sleeping in a hospital bed. All that blood. “I saw it.”

“Cheryl, whatever you saw...” Teresa starts explaining, but struggles to talk whilst trying to lay the teen back on the bed. “Was just a dream. A bad dream.”

No. It wasn’t. Cheryl was awake. She was watching the monitor, the lines going up and down, its beeps. Her eyes were heavy but she didn’t close them. She didn’t.

There’s no way she would allow herself to sleep when Toni’s in need of constant vigilance.

“No.” She breathes. “I saw it. I saw **her**.”

Penelope. Alive. Bloodied, but alive. Holding a gun. The same one she used to kill Nana Rose and the employees of Thistlehouse. The same gun she used to kill hers-

Cheryl closes her eyes and exhale sharply. Penelope can’t be alive. She saw her die.

She fell asleep. How could she?

“Who is it that you saw, honey?” Teresa asks, carefully.

Cheryl feels her arm itch, and when she looks down at it, there’s an iv needle attached to her right hand. That makes no sense.

“Teresa, what’s the meaning of this iv needle?” She asks, as a way to avoid her foster mom’s questions and clarifying her situation at the same time.

“You’re dehydrated, Cheryl.” Teresa answers, sternly. “And exhausted.”

“I’m not...”

Before she can protest, the woman continues. Her face shows softness, despite her worries.

“You were hysterical, Cheryl. It took three nurses to hold you while another one applied the sedative. And that’s because you were asleep!” She says, and Cheryl can do nothing but lower her head. “They called me as soon as they could.”

It’s overwhelming. All that information is overwhelming, of course. Cheryl’s never meant to cause that much of a fuss, she’s never meant to do anything that would force her to leave Toni’s side. And yet, there she is. Too many thoughts running in her head that she can’t even manage to ask who’s keeping her girlfriend company. Who’s watching the heart rate monitor.

“You’re making yourself sick, Cheryl.” Teresa speaks again. “I don’t want to keep you away from Toni, but if that’s what it has to be done, I’ll do it. I can’t have you watching over your girlfriend if you show the need to have someone doing the same over you.”

Her breaths became erratic with that statement. Cheryl can’t help the tears that fall from her eyes as she hears Teresa speak. She can’t be away from Toni. She can’t leave her. She can’t let Toni go.

She let Jason go. Look where it got him. That can’t happen to Toni. She needs to be with her.

“Please, Teresa. Please.” She cries louder, sobbing even. “I promise I’ll take care of myself. Please! Don’t keep me away from her, please.”

Teresa’s face softens at those pleads, and she tries her best to wipe the tears from Cheryl’s face.

“You have to eat and drink water.” Cheryl nods, frantically. “Whenever someone comes to visit, you’re going to eat and drink water right in front of them.” She nods again, hiccuping, trying to swallow her cries and show Teresa she can be stable.

She has to. For Toni.

“And you need to rest. And sleep properly”

That’s going to be the biggest problem of all. It’s not like she forces herself awake every half an hour when she manages to sleep just to check Toni’s vitals. It just happens. And if she just decides not to go back to sleep after the third time it happens, it’s because her mind is already convinced she’s rested. So why would she go back to sleep when Toni could wake up at any moment? Or not...

Well, Cheryl supposes she can pretend she’ll do as Teresa says when it comes to that matter. It’s not like anyone will be there to make sure she’s sleeping.

“When can I go back to her room?” She asks, a tacit answer to Teresa’s last order.

“The doctor will come here to discharge you at any moment.”

-

It’s on the eighth day that things change. For the best.

Cheryl’s doing her homework, as she promised Teresa she would, when she hears a whimper. At first, all she does is lightly slap her temple, convincing herself it might be another episode where she’s falling asleep and imagining things.

Then she hears a raspy voice.

“Cher?”

Toni Topaz is staring at her, a confused expression on her face. As if she had no idea what’s going on.

She’s been unconscious for the past eight days, of course she has no idea what’s going on.

At first, Cheryl’s frozen in place. Unsure of what to do. She wants to approach Toni, hold her hand and tell her she loves her over and over again. She’s to afraid to do so. She’s afraid that she’ll get too close, then suddenly realize it’s just a dream.

A sob leaves her as Cheryl’s deciding what to do. Toni’s confusion seemingly grow bigger, as her brows furrow and she looks at Cheryl sobbing in front of her.

“Baby...” Toni calls. And Cheryl can’t believe she’s hearing her voice. “Baby, what’s wrong? Come here...” As she reaches out to Cheryl, her expression turns into a grimace. Pain.

“Don’t move!” Cheryl lets out between her sobs. “You’re hurt.” She says. And she wants to reach back, desperately. But what if it’s not real?

Cheryl fails to realize that ever since her brother died, there hasn’t been a day where she dreams of nice things. And that is the best thing she could possibly dream of.

“Cher, baby, please...” Toni’s pleads cause her to cry even more when she sees the tears forming in her girlfriend’s eyes. It seems so real. “Please, Cheryl, come here.”

So Cheryl stands up and walks to the chair beside the bed. The one she usually sits on when she’s in vigilance. The button to call the nurse is right next to her, so it’s a good opportunity for her to press it.

If it’s a dream, all she’s going to be is shaken awake. Or sedated to unconsciousness.

“I don’t want to wake up.” She whispers, grabbing one of Toni’s hands in hers, kissing her knuckles. She can’t believe it.

“Bombshell, you’re awake.” Toni speaks, weakly, as if she’s coming back to her senses and feeling all the pain she should have been feeling these past eight days.

“Promise?” Cheryl asks, leaning closer and pressing her forehead into hers. Even if she isn’t, she wants to kiss Toni.

If all of that isn’t real, she needs to feel Toni’s lips against hers again. One last time, if her reality proves to be as cruel as it has been in the past. So she does it. Gently, Cheryl presses her lips against Toni’s.

It can’t be a dream. It can’t be a dream.

Then, a nurse comes with a smile on her face and starts talking to Toni. Saying she’s glad the girl’s awake. Cheryl even registers the lady mentioning how the redhead hasn’t left Toni’s side ever since.

And, despite her state, and the pain that it’s starting to kick in, Toni looks at Cheryl and smiles. That marvelous smile Cheryl absolutely loves.

It’s real.

Toni is alive.

Toni is going to live.

-

Once again, Toni beats the odds and is able to go home after three weeks in the hospital. The doctors gave her a estimative of another month, at least, given the placement of the wound, but she’s a fighter, and she’s amazing, and extremely lucky, apparently.

The house is ready for their return. Teresa mentions she’s going to be Amber’s roommate for a while, so Toni can be comfortable in the master bedroom. Cheryl's by her side, always. Obviously.

Toni still has two weeks off from school, which means Cheryl’s gonna miss her classes for another two weeks. The thought of leaving her girlfriend never goes through her mind. Mr. Weatherbee won’t be happy, but Cheryl couldn’t care less. 

She has a list of priorities and Toni is the first one. 

Most of the medicines make Toni sleepy, and she takes a lot of those. Therefore, she sleeps a lot. It’s her last weeks of bed rest, and she definitely makes the most of them. Whereas Cheryl can’t wait for the day the medicines won’t need to be taken anymore, because whenever her girlfriend is awake, it’s fine, but anxiety cripples through her mind every time Toni yawns, showing signs of tiredness.

Of course Toni needs rest. And of course Toni's doing better than any doctor could have predicted. That fact alone don’t really ease Cheryl the way she thought it would. 

So whenever Toni sleeps, Cheryl monitors. She lays by the pink haired girl’s side and watches the rise and fall of her chest, she sometimes places her hand right below the girl’s nose to make sure she’s breathing, and she gently cuddles the sleeping teen, just so she can put her head on Toni’s chest and feel her heartbeat. She can even hear the heart monitor in her head. 

Technically, she was supposed to be resting. Technically, everyone thinks she is, since she goes to bed as well, whenever Toni feels sleepy. Technically, she should be sleeping more than three hours a night. Realistically, it’s all different.

Realistically, Cheryl feels more exhausted than when she was monitoring Toni at the hospital. Realistically, she doesn’t want to fall asleep and have a nightmare that might cause her to trash and turn in bed, hurting Toni in the process.Realistically, she’s afraid to close her eyes and wake up to a dead girlfriend by her side. 

There’s a constant buzz in her head now. Sometimes it’s really loud, sometimes it’s really really low. But it’s there. Just like sometimes Penelope Blossom is standing at the end of the bed, and sometimes she isn’t. Just like sometimes the water in the shower mixes with the blood in Cheryl’s hands, and sometimes it doesn’t. Because it’s all in her head. And she knows it. It doesn’t stop, however, the panic when she sees whatever it is that’s not real. 

Thankfully, Toni is just as clingy as Cheryl is worried. Which means she doesn’t mind the redhead’s presence next to her all the time. Cheryl sees the love in her eyes when she brings their breakfast in bed. Sees how happy she is whenever she’s allowed to choose one of those documentaries instead of a classic like Mean Girls. Sees how, before bed, Toni holds her, close and tightly, in the way Cheryl can’t return because she’s too afraid to hurt her, or open her wound - that is healing really nicely, in fact -.

“I'm not going to break, Cher.” Toni speaks one night, when she has her arms around the redhead but Cheryl only gently places her head against the pink haired girl’s chest, not daring to place an arm anywhere near the girl’s stomach. 

‘You might.’ Cheryl wants to reply, but quietly wraps an arm around her girlfriend, instead, carefully avoiding the injury. She’s grown incredibly quiet lately, introspective, only speaking when she absolutely has to, or when Toni’s looking at her with those wide eyes that melt her heart and she can’t help but speak up.

It’s never about important things, though. It’s never about how Penelope is constantly haunting her, and she doesn’t even knows why it happens. It’s never about the blood she can’t seem to wash away from her hands. It’s never about all the despair she’s felt those past weeks. It’s always about the movie they’re about to watch, or the latest Riverdale High gossip Amber’s just texted her, just trivial things.

She has a lot in her mind, but it’s hard to put those feelings into words. It’s not like she was ever taught to be so transparent, no matter how much she knows Toni expects her to be. 

Toni, that even after a nearly death experience, smiles the sweetest smiles. Toni, that despite the pain, always tries to go to the living room when Katya and Jigsaw are home from school. Toni, who looks at Cheryl with adoring eyes and waits for her to turn the lights off and cuddle her before drifting off to sleep - Cheryl doesn’t dare telling her the darkness is terrifying now. Toni needs to rest -. 

The only constant words that come out of Cheryl’s mouth are the ones she says to Toni before each time her girlfriend is about to fall asleep. “I love you, TT.” She never knows when it could be the last time she says them. Or the last time she hears “I love you too, Cher.” back. 

-

“I think I’m going crazy.” Cheryl says one day, safe into her girlfriend’s embrace, comfortably laying on their bed, in the dark. She actually whispers, knowing Toni may not hear her, but hoping she does. “That those ‘deranged genes’ you talked about are showing themselves.”

It’s dark, so she can’t really see Toni opening her eyes, she feels her inhaling sharply. And that’s when Cheryl knows she was heard. 

“What makes you say that, baby?” Her girlfriend asks, gently, and Cheryl’s not sure if she’s being cautious because of what was said or because it’s one of the first times Cheryl initiates the conversation. Either way, it sounds like Toni doesn’t want to scare her away. “When I said that, Cher, I didn’t mean it. I was angry, you were angry. I’m really sorry…”

“There's no need to apologize, TT.” She dismisses,raising her head to place a kiss on Toni’s jawline. 

It’s not like Cheryl disagrees with her. For her, there’s no other explanation as to why she keeps seeing her psychopath dead mother everywhere, whenever she glances at a spot too fast, or whenever she’s about to fall asleep. Or why her hands are clean when she enters the shower but as soon as she closes her eyes and reopens them, they’re covered in blood. It’s derangement, plain and simple. 

She doesn’t think of trauma or exhaustion, only madness. 

“There is, if you’re here thinking you’re going crazy, Cher.” 

Cheryl quickly regrets starting that conversation. She realizes it was a lapse of judgment to say that, to Toni from all people, when there are bigger things to worry about. She can’t have Toni worrying about her when the girl is recovering from a bullet wound. 

_Selfish._ Penelope is not around at that moment, but Cheryl hears her voice. 

“Let's go to sleep, TT. Your medicine must be kicking in and I know you’re trying hard to stay awake.” She says, snuggling her head back to its place, where she can hear Toni’s heartbeat, where she can monitor them.

“I know you’re not sleeping much, Cheryl.” Toni speaks, and Cheryl feels rather than sees her suppressing a yawn. “I was hoping you’d talk to me about it. But you never do…”

“Toni, you’re in recovery.Don’t worry about that.” Cheryl pleads, feeling the tears pool in her eyes. “Just focus on getting better.”

_Selfish._ She shouldn’t have said anything. Now Toni’s going to have one more thing to worry about.

“If we go to sleep now, I trust we’re going to talk about what you’ve said in the morning.” Her girlfriend says, stubbornly. “Cheryl, if you’re saying things like that, it’s because something’s going on. You’re my girlfriend, I want to know everything."

Cheryl can feel how tired Toni is, from the way her words start to sound slurred, and the way her breaths are slowly falling into a peaceful rhythm. She feels bad once again for denying her girlfriend the sleep she needs for the sake of her selfish reasons. 

If she’s actually going crazy, though, there’s nothing Toni or anyone can do to help her. 

“TT, please.” She tries again, swallowing her tears. “You need to rest. You almost died, Toni.” 

“I almost died, Cher.” Toni confirms, somehow sensing exactly the root of Cheryl’s troubled thoughts, even if the Blossom herself has yet to figure it out. "It took me a while, but I’ve made peace with it.” It took her exactly two weeks and four days, Cheryl remembers, she was there for her during every single stage. Toni grabs Cheryl’s hand, brushing her thumb against the back of it, and places it on her scar. She whimpers and tries to pull her hand away, but Toni’s hold is strong, despite its gentleness. “When are you going to do the same?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh... at least no one got shot this time?
> 
> Anyways, you can find me on twitter @bckwrds101 :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there. How's everyone doing? I hope you're all fine. 
> 
> As I said on Twitter (@bckwrds101) this story is coming to an end. Next chapter is probably the last (for a while, I can't promise this will be back, just like I can't promise this won't be back...), so I would like to thank you all for reading it (: It makes me happy to know people actually take time to read the stuff I write. 
> 
> On a different note, this chapter is the shortest one I've written. Not in terms of words, I'm not sure about it, but in terms of the amount of pieces. This one only has three, whereas some chapters had like five or six. I hope you like it, still.
> 
> Enjoy the chapter :)

“You’re going to regret this, Mantle.” Cheryl says, squinting her eyes in defiance. Her hands are closed tightly in fists, her nails nearly digging in her palms.

“I’m not afraid, Blossom.” Reggie replies, a smirk on his face. He crosses his arms in front of his chest, staring at the redhead. “Bring it on.”

“Are you sure this was a good idea?” Toni looks at Amber, apprehensive. She has her arms around her Cheryl and her chin resting on the girl’s shoulder.

With a shrug, Amber looks at her sister and her boyfriend. They’re in a intense staring competition, looking at each other in anger. Almost hatred.

“I thought it was.” Amber says. “But I didn’t think it would turn out like this.”

“Is it war that you want, Reginald? War you shall have.”

Toni rolls her eyes at her girlfriend’s dramatics. The situation is not ideal, but it’s not as bad as Cheryl’s making it seem.

“It’s fine, Cher.” Toni places a kiss on her shoulder, trying to get her to calm down.

Reggie is still smirking at her, but Amber quickly slaps his arm. “Stop it.” She mutters, causing his smirk to drop instantly.

“It’s your fault, Amber.” Toni says when she has to hold Cheryl back so she doesn’t end up punching Reggie, the redhead struggling to set herself free.

“Not my fault.” Amber retorts, sighing. “Northsiders...” She mutters under her breath.

Cheryl whips her head to look at her with a scowl. “I’m not a Northsider.” She reminds her sister. Not anymore.

“If you were, I’m sure you wouldn’t suck at this so bad.” Reggie chimes in, a victorious smile on his face.

“Wait till I fucking buy 101 Dalmatians.” Cheryl lets out through gritted teeth and Toni laughs humorously.

“Next time we’re playing Poker, babe.” She says, and Cheryl feels herself relax in her embrace.

She’s good at that game. Years of hiding her true self and covering up all the abuse she’s suffered made her poker face unbeatable.

Reggie’s never beaten her at it. No Bulldog has. Memories of all the Poker Nights at Thornhill when Jason used to bring the boys over - only for them to be destroyed by Cheryl and lose all their bets - flood Cheryl’s mind. Apparently not only hers.

“Not gonna get my ass beaten up by Cheryl in Poker when I’m doing perfectly fine with taking all her money in Monopoly Disney.” Reggie says, his eyes softer than before, offering Cheryl a playful grin. She can help but smile back in gratitude before rolling her eyes.

With all that’s been going on, there’s no way Cheryl can afford getting lost in the memories of good old days with her brother, only to remember he’s not there by her side anymore. Then to be reminded once again that Toni almost suffered the same destiny. So if Reggie Mantle teasing her about his - definitely - luck in that stupid children’s game is what it takes to have her not going down that road, she’s thankful he understands it.

“Just roll the dice before I stop holding Cheryl back and she breaks the board, Mantle.” Toni says.

“As you wish, Topaz.” He answers, obeying the girl’s command. “Watch me getting a nine so we can build something in Snow White, babe.” He tells Amber with a grin and Cheryl all but gags when the girl pulls him for a kiss when he gets exactly the number he mentioned.

“You’re disgusting.” She comments, her nose scrunched in fake disgust.

“And you’re losing all your money.” Amber reminds her.

“Watch till we fucking buy 101 Dalmatians.” Toni repeats Cheryl’s words from before and the redhead in her arms nods in approval, snuggling impossibly closer when it’s Toni’s time to throw the dice.

The next day, both girls will return to school. Toni’s been getting better day by day, under nearly no medication at all anymore. Cheryl’s slightly apprehensive, happy that Toni’s getting back to being herself, but worried about what there is to come when they eventually get back to doing business for the Serpents, walking along the streets from the Wyrm to their house late at night.

Nothing better to ease the tension than a couple’s game night. Even if the game itself is making Cheryl angry, at least she’s not thinking about her girlfriend almost losing her life and all the complications that came with that. And yes, seeing Penelope Blossom with those wicked eyes ready to attack them is still proving to be a current complication Cheryl deals with... in silence, of course.

For that night, all she has to focus is on buying the most expensive characters on that Monopoly board.

-

If there’s something Cheryl’s always been proud of, is her ability to talk to people and get what she wants. She knows exactly what to say, when to say it, how to react... she knows whether the person will crumble with a sweet approach or an aggressive one. She knows it.

So it’s a surprise only for Toni when she leaves Wheatherbee’s office with nothing but a pamphlet advertising the great counseling system Riverdale High has to offer. Not that Cheryl really cares or pays any mind to it, but she’s good at talking to people, and she knows exactly when to compromise.

If compromising means she needs to accept the stupid pamphlet in order to leave the office, she’ll gladly do it. It’s not like he’s making her attend any sessions anyways.

“I thought you’d get a warning, at best. An order to repeat the whole semester, at worst.” Her girlfriend comments as they walk along the hallway to get to their first class of the day, first class after a few weeks of absence.

They share Politics in first period, which Cheryl absolutely thanks heavens for. After that, however, their schedules are completely different, for Cheryl’s dismay. She considered asking Wheatherbee to change her classes so she could stay by Toni’s side all the time, but it would be too much, and it would probably have angered the Principal and he’d have taken away all the privileges she’s acquired, along with chastising her for all the things she’s already leaving unpunished for.

So, technically, she’s supposed to be separated from Toni after first period. Realistically, she doesn’t think she can bring herself to do it.

“Don’t be so surprised, mon petite amour.” She looks proudly to her side and sees Toni let out a chuckle along with a roll of her eyes. Toni finds these nicknames ridiculously cute, and very dramatic, as she told Cheryl one day, but she loves it and smiles that precious smile the redhead absolutely loves every time she hears them. “I’ve known my ways with Wheatherbee ever since my first year here.”

“I certainly don’t underestimate your power now.”

“And have you ever, mon tresór?” That earns her another smile.

“I must say I didn’t really thought of you as the most powerful the first time I saw you, especially not with Cece’s fist so close to your pretty face.” Toni says, a teasing smile on her face, causing Cheryl to be the one rolling her eyes. “But I knew you had it in you somewhere.”

“Please! Cece wouldn’t last a day in Riverdale High. Not with me ruling these hallways anyways.” The redhead dismisses, hearing Toni chuckle by her side.

She’s never going to take the small smiles, the wide ones, the chuckles and the loud laughs for granted ever again. And to think she’d almost been deprived of that for the rest of her life. 

No. Cheryl refuses to think about that. Not when things are finally going back to normal. Or as normal as it can get back to in Riverdale. Thankfully, Toni pulls her out of her thoughts with a thoughtful comment. 

“Well, aside from the fact that people now see you hanging out with Southside trash, you’d be a great princess, babe.”

Cheryl smiles widely, but rolls her eyes nonetheless. “Don’t be ridiculous, TT. I’d be the queen, obvi.”

“Obvi.” When Toni agrees, Cheryl sees an amused smile gracing her girlfriend’s features.

How did she get so lucky to have Toni Topaz smiling at her like that?

“Besides, Reggie is dating Amber, which means we’ve got the Bulldogs by our side. And I’m co-captain of the Vixens, which means they can talk shit, but the throne is still mine.” She completes her trail of thoughts. 

It’s not that the throne itself is important. It’s just… Knowing how she was looked down on by these people when she got back to Riverdale High after moving to the southside, and how she is now almost back to where she was when she left, in terms of status, is rewarding, to say the least. No matter how much her attitude has changed.

“And Veronica’s…” Toni reminds her. The part where Cheryl's the co-captain is hardly remembered lately, the redhead only focus on the ‘captain' title. Despite the fact that none of them have been attending practices and, if Cheryl’s so adamant about being by Toni’s side, won’t do so any time soon.

“Has it ever been hers, really?” 

That question, along with raised eyebrows in defiance and a fiery look in Cheryl’s eyes, shows that an answer is not even necessary.

“I suppose not.” The pink haired girl gives in, with a shrug. “On a different note, Cher. Are you attending?”

“Attending what?”

Toni motions her head to the pamphlet she’s still holding, and Cheryl smiles. Oh, how naive of Toni to think she actually has to attend these sessions.

“Of course not, TT.” With a quick gesture, she crushes the paper in her hands and is ready to throw it in the nearest trash bin when Toni stops her. “Toni?”

“Would it be that bad?” She asks, her eyes pleading Cheryl not to get mad at her. A slight furrow in the redhead’s brows showing it might happen nevertheless.

“Going to counseling? Are you even serious right now?” Cheryl scoffs, once again attempting to throw the paper away. And once again being stopped by Toni when the pink haired girl gently closes a hand on her wrist. “TT!” A high pitched protest leaves her as her girlfriend comes closer, gently moving their arms down to their sides.

“Cher, I’m serious.” Toni says in a lower voice. “There’s nothing wrong with that. Sweet Pea attended counseling once, it helped him a lot, actually, his anger is better managed now and...”

Cheryl can almost hear Penelope Blossom scoffing, and Clifford Blossom nearly breaking his coffin in despise. There’s nothing wrong with being weak, that’s basically what Toni is saying. Her parents were laughing at her from hell, for sure.

“Only I don’t need help, Toni.” She says, finding that idea absurd. “Counseling...” Cheryl can’t help but mutter in anger under her breath. “As if I needed it.” She’s about to let herself go and enter their classroom when her girlfriend tightens the hold on her wrist slightly, not to hurt her, only to stop her from leaving.

Toni sighs, and Cheryl realizes her girlfriend expected that reaction from her, but is disappointed nonetheless. There’s also a glimmer in the other girl’s eyes, determination, Cheryl sees. And that’s how she knows the subject will not be dropped.

“Are you really going to pretend that night didn’t exist?” Toni asks, soft but firmly, as if proving a point. “When you chose to tell me you thought you were going crazy, then brushed it off as if it were nothing? And I said we were going to talk about it the next day, but we didn’t...”

They really didn’t. Cheryl made sure to keep herself and Toni busy that day, with people by their side when Toni wasn’t sleeping, hoping the meds would make her girlfriend forget her late night confessions. Clearly, it didn’t work. Toni just decided to approach the issue another day, in another way.

“There’s nothing to talk about, Toni.” It’s not like Cheryl’s going to give up on brushing that subject off. It’s not like she needs it, right? “It was a slip of tongue. Nothing more.”

“Yeah? But if your tongue slipped and you said that, it means it’s true, doesn’t it? It means that you thought you’re going crazy.” Toni says, moving closer to her, their faces are almost touching now, and the pink haired girl has nothing but worry in her eyes.

“So what if I did? It wasn’t an easy time, Toni. You can’t blame me.” She tries to let herself go again, a bit more aggressively this time, given how upset she’s becoming. 

“I’m not.” Toni tries to hold her once again. Her eyes shine in a pleading way, as if she’s begging Cheryl not to step away from her. Begging Cheryl to stay and talk about what’s going on. There’s clearly a lot going on. "Baby, I’m not. It’s just... you haven’t had a lot of easy times lately. Like, ever?” She says, softly. Cheryl is still tense under her touch, but that softness is well welcomed by the redhead, who stops fighting to set herself free. “I mean, with all that’s happened in your life, Cher. No one can blame you for showing signs of distress or trauma.”

It doesn’t mean whatever’s going on is going to be acknowledged by her. Cheryl curses herself for opening her mouth and saying all those things about being crazy and having her deranged genes. It may be true, but it’s not something she needs to get Toni worried about. 

If Cheryl’s being honest, Toni being worried about it is probably the best case scenario. The worst one consists of her girlfriend leaving her after realizing how deranged Cheryl really is. And just the thought of having Toni walking away from their relationship is enough to make her heart beat fast on her chest and her eyes water. 

Toni can’t leave her.

“I told you, Toni. It’s nothing, probably a one time slip of tongue.” She says, trying hard to convince her girlfriend everything’s fine. 

Toni can’t leave her. 

“So you don’t think you’re crazy? You’re not thinking about that right now? It was just a one time thought?”

Of course Cheryl thinks she’s crazy. Of course she knows it’s not normal to see glimpses of her wicked mother every time she’s distracted, or every night before going to bed. Of course it wasn’t just a one time thought. Of course she’s never going to say that. Of course she’s going to deflect, as always.

And of course Toni can see through her bullshit. Which angers her so much, it’s even hard to explain.

“I. Do. Not. Need. Counseling.” She says, through gritted teeth, finally setting herself free after aggressively pulling her forearm away from the girl’s touch.

“No, Cher. You need therapy at its finest. But it’s not like we can afford it, so counseling is the best second option we have.” And when Toni tries to reason with her by placing a hand on her arm, she slaps it away in anger.

“Get your hands off my body.”

Despite the fact they’re right in front of their classroom, Cheryl turns around and walks away. Toni is a Serpent, there are a lot of other Serpents around. Everywhere, in every class the pink haired girl attends. There’s no need to worry about being close to her all the time, Cheryl tries to tell herself as she closes the gym door behind herself and hides behind the bleachers.

She’s missed so many weeks of school, missing another day won’t make a difference.

It doesn’t really register in her head that she’s the one that ended up leaving Toni. 

-

Toni is fine. Cheryl thinks for the hundredth time as she sits at the Bulldogs table with Reggie Mantle and all the boys surrounding her. She tries not to look too much at the Serpents table. She doesn’t want to feel tempted to walk there to check on Toni.

Toni is fine. Teresa is making sure she takes her meds and goes to her doctors’ appointments, Amber is making sure she doesn’t walk alone from one class to the other and Sweet Pea and Fangs are making sure no one bothers her. She is fine, she doesn’t need Cheryl.

It doesn’t stop her from checking on the pink haired girl from a distance. She can’t even recall a class that she hasn’t asked for the bathroom pass just so she can walk to Toni’s classroom and see how she’s doing though the door’s framed glass. She’s not even back to attending Vixens practice, just so she has an excuse to go back home at the same time Toni does.

So Toni is doing fine. Recovering better than expected, according to Teresa, who had told Cheryl the day before about the girl’s doctor appointment, and how amazed they were at her recovery. It was also followed by a questioning glance as to why Cheryl’s asking her and not asking Toni herself, then another pitiful glance as she realized the redhead is still sleeping on the couch.

And Toni doesn’t need her. Cheryl thinks it’s more like she’s the dependent one, if she’s being honest. It’s like she can barely function without her girlfriend close to her, or maybe it’s just the fact that she can’t really think about anything else when they’re currently not in the best place with their relationship.

Therefore Toni’s not gonna be the one to look for her so they can talk about their issues, like she’s done the last time they’ve fought. And Cheryl’s too proud to do it. It’s not like she wants to, anyways. Toni had suggested her to attend counseling sessions. And said she needed therapy. What will she do next? Make sure Cheryl’s admitted into a hospice? 

That’s ridiculous. Cheryl doesn’t need therapy. Everybody has their demons, Cheryl’s been dealing with hers just fine. So what if she sees her dead mother ready to shoot them every night? So what if there’s a constant buzz in her head and she has no idea where it’s coming from? So what if sometimes she’s unable to hear exactly what people say, or clearly see whatever is in front of her, with a feeling that she’s out of her body by barely doing the minimum, just breathing and existing? She’s managing.

Cheryl Blossom is the queen of compartmentalizing.

Counseling... as if she needs it.

“Did the chicken call you names or something?” A male voice pulls her out of her thoughts and Cheryl looks to her right side and sees Reggie Mantle looking at her with a questioning glance, almost a cautious one. She’s been stabbing her lunch with the fork all this time. 

“Not the chicken.” She says with a sigh, noticing the boys brows furrowing in confusion. “I haven’t heard the nicest things lately, though.”

“Who’s giving you a hard time?” He asks, seemingly ready to gather the Bulldogs and find the person that’s got Cheryl feeling like that.

“I don’t want you to hurt her.”

For as clueless as Reggie seems, he picks it up right away.

“Oh, I guess there’s still trouble in paradise.” 

“What has Amber told you?” With a sigh, Cheryl asks.

It’s not like she wants to talk about it. But it’s not like she wants to hold it in either. And Reggie seems to be the only one ready to listen to whatever it is that she wants to say.

“What you and Toni have told her... which equals to absolutely nothing.” He shrugs, as if he’s trying to remain impartial. He’s failing. Because Cheryl knows he has an opinion he’s leaning onto. “All she knows you’re fighting. And she can’t figure out whose fault is it because you both have an attitude.”

Reggie was her brother’s best friend. Which means he’s been in Cheryl’s life ever since she can remember. It doesn’t matter if she liked his presence or not - she didn’t really mind it, actually -, he was constantly there - she can even say that if there’s one person she’s learned sharing Jason with, it was Reggie -. Which means she knows him just as well as she’d known her brother. 

The fact that she can relate to him more than she could ever relate to Jason makes her think that she knows him even more. 

With that in mind, she asks. “And what do you think?” Cheryl’s sure he has something to say.

“I think it’s definitely not on her.” 

And that opinion makes Cheryl look at him in disdain. Anger even. If she could actually stab someone at that moment, it would definitely not be the stupid chicken on her plate. 

“Don’t look at me like that, Cheryl. I’m your brother’s best friend.” Reggie says, raising his arms in protests when he notices the girl holding her fork with more strength than it’s necessary.

“Was.” She corrects, because there’s nothing much she can say to counter that statement. That’s basically the same thing she thought a few moments before. 

“Regardless of verb tenses, I know you just as well as I knew your brother.” 

Cheryl raises her eyebrows at him, once again unable to counter that. She motions for him to continue talking, putting her best resting bitch face on to listen to whatever he has to say.

“Remember when you called Polly Cooper a bitch because Jason said he couldn’t go to Pop’s with us?”

She does. Jason didn’t talk to her for days.

“Or when you decided to ruin Ethel Muggs’ birthday party just because Jason said she was nice and he was going to attend it?”

“I couldn’t have possibly made it rain that day, Reggie.” Cheryl protests with an insincere roll of eyes. She tries to reason with him even though she knows pretty well that’s not what he meant by talking about Ethel’s birthday party - that never really happened because the location was weather dependent and the weather turned out to be awful that day -.

“But you said so many hurtful things to her when she handed you and your brother the invitation that even if the party at the park had actually happened, she wouldn’t feel any joy about it.”

It was the first - and the last - time Jason called her a monster. He apologized to her afterwards, of course, saying he didn’t really mean that. 

Cheryl’d always known he did. She is what she is.

“There was also that time when Jason decided to partner up with Chuck and not you in the playground and you made sure he fell on his face. Mr. Clayton had to take him to the hospital because he thought his son had broken his nose.”

She snorts humorlessly at that, even though she’s pretty sure the only reason Chuck fell so hard was because there was a rock on the ground. Not because of the push he’d received.

“Are you trying to prove a point or just calling me out on every time I was wrongly obsessed with the idea that my brother should choose me over any other friend of his at any given time?” She asks as if that’s just another conversation they’re having. As if she’s bored of being called out on the mean things she’s done on her younger days. Which were a lot. 

“My point is, I know how you act after a fight. And I know especially how you act after a fight that’s mostly on you, it doesn’t matter if it’s your actual fault or if it’s just your pride stopping you from moving forward.” He says, straightforwardly. He points at her and moves her finger up and down with a shake of his head. “And it’s exactly like that.”

“You’re wrong.” 

Is he, though?

“Am I, now?” The boy asks, genuinely curious. Cheryl would be too if she were him, given how much they claim to know each other well, despite never really calling themselves friends. 

“She was the one to stay things I didn’t want to hear.” She explains, and nothing can prepare her for what Reggie asks next.

“How much of it did you actually need to hear though?”

That’s ridiculous, she thinks. She’s doing just fine, she doesn’t need what Toni said she did. Toni is the one that almost died, why would Cheryl be the one attending counseling, for heavens sake.

“None of it!” She says, her voice raises its volume and brings attention to their conversation. Most eyes inside the cafeteria now stare at them. 

“If you say so…” Reggie shrugs, lowering his voice. 

Everyone goes back to paying attention to whatever they were doing before being interrupted by Cheryl’s loud exclamation. There’s nothing else happening, only silence between the captain of the Bulldogs and the captain - co-captain, whatever - of the Vixens. 

Surprisingly, Cheryl is the one to break the silence after a few more unenthusiastic stabs in her lunch. Her voice is low, almost a whisper, and she tries her best to conceal the tears in her eyes when she speaks.

“Do you think there’s something wrong with me?”

Reggie snorts, looking at her with a smile before answering.“Ever since we were seven and you told me The Beatles were way better than The Rolling Stones.” 

“I'm serious, Reggie.” She says, her eyes never meeting his.

“So am I, Cher.” He responds. "You’re asking me if I think there’s something wrong with you? Fuck, I think there’s something wrong with everyone in this stupid town.” 

His answer is sincere and makes her smile, because it’s not like she can disagree with that logic. It does not stop her from not looking up at him when she says her next words. 

“Toni said I need to go to the counselor.” She’s now focusing solely on playing with the food she’s not even going to eat. 

“She did?” He asks, sounding the least surprised possible.

“Well, she actually said I needed therapy but we can’t afford it, so the counselor is just the only option I have.” Cheryl explains, detailedly, hoping to get a better reaction from him. She even looks up to meet his eyes, trying to convey how ridiculous that is. 

How can he not be surprised by what she’s just said? 

“Right.” His tone doesn’t really change, he sounds slightly confused, even. Actually, he sounds like that’s not just the most absurd thing he’s ever heard. “So?”

“So, what?” 

“Are you going or?” He asks, once again missing the point. 

“That’s crazy!” Cheryl says, trying her best not to yell at Reggie for asking that absurd question. She lowers her voice even more to whisper. "I don’t need counseling!” As if talking about it itself would make her sound anything less than normal. 

As if no one could hear that possibility is even in the world. Cheryl Blossom cannot and will not appear to be one of those people that needs help. She doesn’t. 

“Your brother is dead, killed by your father, who, later, chose to hang himself instead of facing the consequences. Then your grandmother died, along with a few workers from Thistlehouse, killed by your mother, who, after shooting them, chose to shoot herself instead of facing the consequences.” 

Reggie doesn't even beat around the bushes as he proffers those words. They’re nothing but the truth and Cheryl’s used to those facts by now. Cheryl realizes that his approach is definitely to give her some kind of reality check, to prove a point by listing all those things. 

There’s not even the need to say that the first two facts themselves are already enough to have someone looking for counseling. Or help of any sort. And things just keep piling up.

That’s Reggie’s straightforward way of telling Cheryl that he definitely agrees with what Toni said. 

"Let’s not talk about how your girlfriend was shot and almost died, but you were the one looking like a breathing corpse when I went there to visit her the other day. Is the idea of you going to the counselor really that crazy?”

Cheryl has nothing to counter Reggie’s statements. She knew his words weren’t lies. All of that happened, except maybe- 

“I wasn’t looking like a breathing corpse.” She protests, crossing her arms in front of her chest with a huff.

“Cheryl, I’m not even kidding. It looked like you were the sick one.” He says, matter-of-factly. Cheryl can hear the sincerity in his voice, the concern he holds when he says those words. “You managed to lose more weight than Topaz, the circles under your eyes were like so freaking dark it seemed like you were hit on the face by two golf balls. I’m sure they’re still there under layers and layers of concealer. And let’s not even talk about how you acted strange that day.”

“You can’t blame me for being worried.” She retorts, even though she knows the battle is lost. 

“I'm not. But I’m just saying things haven’t been easy on you…” Toni’s said the same thing that day. “It would only be reasonable for you to look for professional help.”

“Is a school counselor really professional help, though?”

“If you want to go to therapy, I can talk to my dad. Tell him I need some money for Bulldogs shit and stuff. Or just ask for some extra cash, it’s not like he cares, you know that.”

Oh, how she does. If there’s anything Cheryl knows about Reggie Mantle is how his father cares for him just as much as her mother used to care for her. Slaps and punches also applied. That’s probably another reason why they’ve spent most of their days together growing up - along with Jason, of course - , why she tolerated him more than she did to others, and why they both became 'all that’s wrong with the northside’ together.

Reggie didn’t really stood by her after everything that's happened. He didn’t really care to look for her or check on how she was doing. But Cheryl can’t really blame him, can she? If it were the other way around, she wouldn’t have done any of that either. 

He’s offering his help now. Because he’s changed. And so has she. 

Realization once again hits her that they’re even less different than she thought they were.

“Thank you, Reginald, but that won’t be necessary.” She says with a smile. “I guess I’ll just find out what this school counselor has to offer.”

“If they’re not of much help, just let me know. We’ll find you a good person.” Reggie offers, grinning as well, turning his head to look at the Serpents' table, causing Cheryl to do the same. They were being watched, but none of them have noticed it before.

Amber and Toni sit together, trying to stare at them discreetly. Failing miserably when both Cheryl and Reggie lock eyes with them. The former looks at her girlfriend and sister with a sadness in her eyes, one that the boy by her side seems to understand.

“You haven't fucked it up for good.” He says, patting her back as if trying to comfort her. “I mean, even Chuck was able to forgive you for that broken nose.” 

“He didn’t even break his nose.” Cheryl protests, with her significant roll of eyes indicating how ridiculous that accusation sounded. The tone of her voice and the smirk on her face show how fun she actually finds that statement. “Besides, it wasn’t me that made him fall. It was a rock on the grass.”

“A rock on the grass and a push on his back, Blossom. We all saw it.” He counters, chuckling as Cheryl waves her hand dismissively at that. 

They look back to the Serpents’ table and Amber and Toni are now engaged in a conversation. Cheryl stares at them longingly, as if she wants nothing more than to be there, taking part of whatever topic they’re talking about. 

“Toni will understand, Cher. She probably already does.” Reggie says when he notices the way she’s looking at the girls. He smiles as she stands up and takes a deep breath. It’s now or never. “Go get your girl back so I can crush you both in Monopoly Disney again.”

“We're playing Poker next time.” Is the last thing Cheryl says before she walks away from him. Towards her girlfriend. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Reggie is not really liked much but... idk, I've said it before and I stand by my statement, I kinda like him. Like, I get people say he's an ass and all, but he has potential to change... idk I just also found it fitting to the story as well.
> 
> Anyways, for those who dislike him, I'm sorry(?) :( For those who like him, yay (?) :)
> 
> Thank you for reading! See you next time :)
> 
> @bckwrds101


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the end!
> 
> Like, seriously, this is definitely the end - I guess -!   
> I just want to thank you all for reading this story, I loved writing it and the fact that people liked it made me really really happy and encouraged me to write even more - clearly, since this story was supposed to be a oneshot lol -. 
> 
> Seriously, thank you for reading, commenting, leaving kudos! You're amazing (:
> 
> Okay, so here it is. I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> @bckwrds101

“Things change…” Reggie says, leaning on door frame. Cheryl's decided to get some air while everyone else debated over what movie they are going to watch. The house gets too cramped sometimes. “Would your fifteen year old self ever guess this is where you'd be in a couple of years?”

Cheryl snorts, because neither of them saw that coming. In another life, perhaps. 

“Even if my fifteen year old self were to guess it, you'd definitely not be by my side in the picture.” She responds with a roll of eyes. 

“You’re right about that, Cheryl Blossom.” He reaches her side and clicks his cup with hers, smiling. “Both of us, dating southsiders. You living amongst them. Hard to imagine."

“But it happened.” She says with a shrug. Some things, despite how unpredictable they are, are meant to happen. Everything happens for a reason. "And I dare to say we're better like that.” 

“We are indeed.” 

It’s quiet for some time. Both teens looking at the street in front of them, then almost at the same time, they look around, accessing the neighborhood, as if understanding their surroundings. Understanding what’s gotten them there and that it’s probably better for them to stay where they are, with whom they’re with. 

Cheryl knows the kind of support she receives here is definitely not something she’d receive in Thistlehouse, or even Thornhill. She wouldn’t really trade it for the world. Not anymore. And Reggie’s been coming around more often, leaving the Serpents alone at school - causing the Bulldogs to do the same -, getting used to the south side of Riverdale for the sake of his relationship, and Cheryl is sure he doesn’t regret it for a moment. He wouldn’t trade what he has with Amber, and with all the meaningful connections he’s made, either. 

They’re not even that different, are they? Two lost privileged teens, finding shelter where they never thought they would. 

“You've come really far, you know that, don't you?” Reggie breaks the silence, saying those words with fondness. Almost as if he’s proud. 

“Uh?"

“After everything you've been through, you're still here, you're still fighting.” He explains, and she looks at him at the same time he looks at her. Up and down, a smile on his face. “Look at you, even going to therapy and all.”

“Counseling.” Cheryl corrects as she crosses her arms in front of her chest with a huff. “ And don’t get too sappy, Mantle. We both know we're not the most fitting for an emotional conversation.” 

Reggie lets out a heartfelt laugh at that statement as Cheryl adverts her eyes to the street just in time to see a motorcycle casually riding around. Some Serpent doing surveillance, probably. She purses her lips in a tight smile and nods at whoever it is under the helmet, and the gang member gives her a two finger salute and goes away. 

That concern the Serpents show for their people doesn’t even surprise Cheryl anymore. They're a family after all.

“All I'm saying is that you manage to try and be a better version of yourself day by day.” He says with a shrug when his laughter dies down. “I'm not saying you've abandoned your bitchy ways. You just care more about others than I thought you ever could.” 

“They make me a better person.”

She has a family now. People who love and support her no matter what. People who’d kill for her, and whom she’d kill for. And as strange as it is, being sheltered on the other side of the tracks by an unusual family, then joining the Serpents later on - another family nonetheless -, has done for her what a lifetime of living with the Blossoms hadn’t. They make her grow, they don’t drag her down, they treat her like one of them - she may have Blossom blood, but that cursed family had never made her feel like she belonged -.

“You're wrong, though. You make yourself a better person, they're just along with you for the ride.” Reggie corrects, a pointed look on his face, causing her to look down at her cup and take a sip before responding. Despite her confidence, she’s not quite used to hearing compliments that are more related to her personality than her looks. Not from anyone other than Toni and her family, anyways. 

Now that it actually sinks in. Reggie is dating Amber. He’s family now. Just like she was family to the Serpents even before joining them, because she’s with Toni. 

“You're not an asshole yourself anymore, Reginald Mantle.” She responds the only way she thinks she knows, with a smile. “I think the southside is rubbing off on you."

“I'll gladly take that as the closest to a compliment you'll ever give me.” He says with a grin, and she can’t really suppress a chuckle. That probably is the only compliment Cheryl has spared him. “And I can’t really deny that. Being with Amber has been the best part of my school life."

“Better than getting the Bulldogs captain title?” She teases, nudging his side with a playful grin that he returns, despite something else in his eyes. Cheryl can’t blame him, the mention of that title also causes some kind of pain on her. 

“I'm not the real captain, though. We both know who should’ve been holding that title."

“There's no one better to hold it in his absence.” Cheryl says, in assurance. She then smiles wider to mask her tears. Talks of Jason always leave her so emotional. "I'm sure he's happy for you.”

“And I'm sure he's proud of you. So proud, Cheryl.” He replies, opening his arms to engulf her in a hug. Cheryl knows he’s probably doing that so she doesn’t notice the tears in his eyes. She’s noticed already. “Look at us…” Cheryl feels him laugh and hears him sniff, so she does the same. "And I thought you said we're not fitting for emotional conversations.” 

“We aren’t. That was a once in a lifetime moment.” She answers, her composure coming back, and scoffs at him. 

They’re about to say something else, or maybe not, when they hear a familiar childish voice. 

“Are you done? We're all waiting for you so we can start the movie.” Jigsaw appears at the door, crossing his arms and tapping his right foot on the floor, impatient. 

Both teens laugh and walk inside, with the kid stomping his feet on the ground. Just as they’re going to take their places next to their significant others, Jigsaw tells Reggie, in a warning tone. “And don't think you'll be sitting next to Amber, smarty-pants."

Cheryl shrugs at him, chuckling and making her way to Toni’s side. Katya is snuggling one of her girlfriend’s sides and the redhead takes the other. She looks at Reggie standing in the middle of the living room and smirks, teasingly. 

“Wait, how come Toni sits next to Cheryl, then?” Reggie protests, but moves to sit on the armchair next to the couch. Amber blows him a kiss and looks at him in apology. ‘Next time, babe’ she mouths.

“Because I trust Toni... you're still on probation.” Sweet Pea and Fangs laugh loudly at that answer, both of them sitting on the ground next to Amber, and Reggie throws a stuffed animal he just found on the chair at them. He misses and it hits Teresa’s leg.

Teresa shakes her head with a smile on her face and proceeds to walk to the DVD and put the chosen movie inside. She likes to do it the old way, with popcorns and DVDs, rejecting Cheryl’s offer to give her the Netflix password - Kevin’s account. He gave it to Fangs, who gave it to Cheryl -, knowing Reggie would never offer his yet, since he’s trying hard not to show off. Even if it’s just a Netflix account, he can afford it and they can’t. 

“AND NO KISSING! Ew.” Jigsaw warns before their foster moms press play.

“All good, baby?” Toni asks in a whisper, probably noticing the small tear track on her cheek from the stubborn tear she couldn’t suppress earlier. 

Toni always knows. She always sees the small details. 

“Of course, mon amour. All is good when you're by my side.” She responds, snuggling even closer and pressing their foreheads together. 

“Such a sweet talker.” Toni says with a smile before she leans and presses her lips to Cheryl’s in a quick peck.

“Hey!” Katya protests. "Saw said no kissing!” "

“I'm sure he meant that for Reggie and Amber.” Cheryl tells her, scrunching her nose and showing the younger girl her tongue. She doesn’t even care that there’s no way that could have been said to Reggie and Amber, since they’re not even next to each other. She wants to kiss Toni and she will kiss Toni. 

“I'm pretty sure he meant that for everyone. Now silence, I love this movie.” Teresa interrupts what’s about to become a bickering from the two girls. She playfully throws a popcorn at Cheryl and glares at Katya. 

“Aren’t you the one that squeals every time Thor so much appears?” Cheryl asks with a scoff, causing Toni to laugh by her side and Katya to let out a giggle.

“Just watch the movie, or you’ll be grounded for two weeks.”

Just a casual Friday night. 

-

Things are getting better. The counseling has been helpful. Both girls are back in Serpent business - the not so risky ones, at least - and Toni's back to work at the Wyrm, they're currently helping the owner and a few serpents organize the place before opening it later - Byrdie said she couldn’t work with Sweet Pea and Fangs alone, they were too much trouble, and only Toni and Cheryl there could actually control them. Cheryl figures this is her own way of saying she misses the girls, but it could just be her own way of saying Sweet Pea and Fangs are about to be fired, she'll never now -. They are at peace. 

And that hits Cheryl right there, at the Wyrms restroom as she washes her hands. Something's wrong. They are at peace.

Some would say it's too pessimistic of her to think about life that way, like a series of unfortunate events that eventually bring her some joy. Joy that doesn't usually last long... this one has been around for at least two weeks. Certainly, something’s wrong.

She doesn't even spare a glance to her reflection in the mirror - the appearance of a Blossom… through and through - before forcefully opening the restroom door and exiting that place. She needs to find Toni. Whatever tragedy about to happen right now cannot threaten her girlfriend. It's okay if she herself gets hurt, or heartbroken... as long as Toni is okay.

Truthfully, there has been a nagging feeling in the back of Cheryl's head these past days. Like she'd forgotten something.

It's sad to realize that the only thing she's forgotten is that, apparently, she's not allowed to be happy.

A loud voice fills her ears before she can actually see what's happening. Andit doesn’t take her long to realize who it belongs to, even if she's only heard it once before. He sounds more sober this time.

A kitchen knife can be reached behind the counter, and Cheryl doesn't think twice before grabbing it. Because Toni cannot get hurt, and that man has hurt her enough for a lifetime. 

Drunk bastard. 

Toni looks smaller with Thomas Topaz Jr. towering over her, being held back by two of the older Serpents. It's visible that the pink haired girl is shaking, despite the way she tries to seem strong in front of him. 

Cheryl wants to kill him. The way she wanted to kill her father when she learned he was the one that murdered her twin brother. Slowly, torturously, watching as he bleeds and begs for mercy - a Blossom through and through. She fails to realize the Blossoms, however, do the work quick and impersonal, leaving it to the others to clean up their mess -. She wants to see Thomas Topaz Jr. suffer. 

Holding the knife tighter, she approaches her girlfriend, standing by her side and glaring at the man. He hasn't stopped yelling, and no one has told him to shut up, only choosing to hold him back as he spits whatever insult he can find on his niece's face.

“-DUMB ENOUGH TO FUCK A BLOSSOM AND NOT USE HER DIRTY MONEY TO PAY THIS FUCKING BILL. WHAT ARE YOU EXPECTING ME TO DO?” 

Right, medical bills. Hasn't life taught her enough about nothing being for free, how could she have forgotten that? How could Toni not have told her about that?

“I'm gonna pay...” Toni mutters by her side. Cheryl knows that tone. Cheryl's used that tone. 

Pure fear. 

“HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU GONNA PAY FOR THAT?” He keeps screaming in rage. “YOU PROBABLY GOT THE SYSTEM'S ATTENTION NOW, YOU DUMB BITCH. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? TO FUCK ME OVER?” The grip on the knife tightens, and Cheryl's hand tremble when she feels Toni sinking further in fear. Looking at the girl, she can see tears glistening in her eyes. 

Thomas Topaz Jr. has to pay. 

“SHUT UP!” Cheryl yells, and widens her eyes in surprise at her own outburst. “WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?” She doesn't realize she's waving the knife in front of him until she sees the man take a step back with no need for the Serpents to pull him back.

Coward.

“YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO RIGHT.” 

The Serpents let him go as Cheryl takes a step forward and Thomas takes a step back. He's bigger, he could easily defeat her in a fight, but Cheryl has a knife and all the intentions to use it if necessary. Maybe if she screams enough he'll come for her and she'll need to defend herself. Self defense excludes the guilt in a jury, doesn’t it? Wanting to kill him and wanting to get arrested for it are two different things, and Cheryl only cares about the former - a Blossom through and through -.

“YOUR NIECE IS A THOUSAND TIMES THE PERSON YOUR PATHETIC SELF WILL EVER BE. HOW DARE YOU SAY THOSE THINGS WHEN YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A VERM NO ONE CAN GET RID OF.” She knows she hit the spot as soon as his eyes sharpen and he's not looking scared anymore. His pride is hurt and all he can think about is hurting Cheryl back. All she needs is a final blow. “You say you're a Serpent by blood, but you'll never be more than a disgusting worm.” The venom that drips from her voice as Cheryl mutters those words is like no other she's ever used to take people down. And, most importantly, it works.

He advances towards her with both his hands ready to grab her neck, and Cheryl is ready to use the knife he's most certainly forgotten about by now. However, someone forcefully pulls her back and she sees another figure standing in front of her, throwing one fist into the man's face. And that is all it takes and he's out. 

Sweet Pea's always had the best punches. 

Cheryl feels Toni's hands around her wrist, urging her closer. She drops the knife and falls into her girlfriend embrace. They're both shaking.

“I was going to kill him.” She confesses in a whisper, hearing Toni's rapid breathes against her ear, as fast as their heartbeat. They're so scared.

“I know.” Toni says, holding her tighter and whispering back. “I'm glad you didn't. You're better than that.” 

Cheryl wants to argue, but has no strength to do so, not after all that's happened. She almost killed someone - a Blossom through and through -.

“You could have told me about the hospital bill.” She chooses to say instead.

“You’re getting better. We were getting better.” It was Toni's time to confess. “I was going to tell you, I just wanted you to have a few more days before giving you something else to worry about.”

-

There's a party in Chains house. Cheryl would be lying if she said that those southside house parties hadn't grown on her in the past months. To the point where she was kinda missing them after everyone moved to Riverdale High and they started crashing Northsiders parties. 

That's where she met Toni. Where they talked for the first time, after Amber basically threw them together and left. She lets out a small chuckle, looking at her girlfriend as she does so. Toni has a smile on her face that indicates they're probably thinking the same thing. 

“You know it was love at first sight, don't you?" The pink haired girl says, a hand placed on Cheryl's waist that always brings her comfort and another holding a beer bottle. She has a grin on her face and a flush on her cheeks that indicates they've been there for a long time and she's getting tipsy.

When they arrived, Fangs was the fist one to greet them with drinks. Apparently they're celebrating the fact that Toni's not on meds anymore and can have as many beers as she wants. Cheryl just goes along with it, even though she's seen her girlfriend and the other Serpents celebrate that same fact at least three times already at the Wyrm.

Cheryl smiles at Toni's statement, like she can't quite believe what she's hearing. She really doesn't.

“What? You were talking to Jughead right over there,” she points to the corner where Jughead was seen by her and Amber during Cheryl's first party there, and giggles when she sees the boy at that exact same spot, with no one around him this time “then you saw an outcast talking to Amber and just realized that pretty redhead was the one for you? I know I'm amazing, TT. But I'm still impressed.” 

It's not like it took her too long to realize she wanted Toni either. 

“You know here wasn't the first time I saw you.” 

“I know, you asked Amber about me... I remember.” Half the reason for her to have gone to that party anyways was to know who was that Toni person asking about her. “Still, it was the first time we actually talked to each other.”

“Well, yes. It doesn't mean I didn't know you were the one for me before we did so.” Toni says “I've known it ever since I saw Cece's fist so close to your beautiful face and stopped her."

“How could you know? You hadn’t even met me."

Toni shrugs, the cutest grin on her face as she takes a sip of her beer.

“It's simple as that, Bombshell. Love is that simple, people are the ones to actually make it complicated.” 

Love. It's that simple, isn't it? 

Cheryl knows Toni gets why it's not that simple for her. Toni is aware of the few experiences Cheryl's had with love before meeting her. She doesn't even blame the redhead for rolling her eyes in disbelief at that statement. Love's been anything but simple for the Blossom heir, considering she'd been denied it by the ones who were supposed to give it to her unconditionally. And the only source of love she'd had was forcefully ripped away from her.

A shot in the head sounded simple - it’s what her father had given Jason without the blink of an eye - . Love, not that much. Not before Toni anyways. 

“It's only simple when I'm with you, TT.”

She knows Toni doesn't doubt her for a second.

-

“Remind me again why are we doing this?"

“Come on, Bombshell.” Toni coaches her with a chuckle. "You can't just wear this cheer uniform and possibly think I won't want some alone time with you.”

"This is giving me major Southside High flashbacks.” Cheryl says as she trips over a broom and has to lean into Toni for support. 

“Hey, at least this door over here locks.” Toni responds, and Cheryl can't quite see her, since the closet is so dark, but she knows her girlfriend is grinning like a child. 

“You're telling me our first kiss was in a closet that couldn't have its door locked?” Cheryl rolls her eyes when Toni lets out a laugh. As if that fact doesn't really matter. It doesn't, but she feels like protesting anyways. “TT. Someone could have walked in on us."

“Baby, just think about how nice of a story it will be to tell our kids."

The first time they've kissed inside the janitor's closet, Cheryl was trying her hardest not to have any expectations - she'd had them anyways. But she can’t really say she didn't try. - 

This time, she's not really that worried. She knows she can have as many expectations as she wants. Toni is hers and she is Toni's. They're not going anywhere.

Besides, it will be a fun story to tell their children in the future, indeed.

-

“Are you happy, TT?” Cheryl asks one day. 

They're both laying on the bed - they've returned to their old room by now - and it's dark and they can't really see each other's faces that well with the only light coming from the moon outside their window. But they can make out each other's features well enough that Toni gently pushes her upper body off the bed to actually look at her.

“You mean, as of right now or..."

“Like in general. Do you consider yourself a happy person?” She explains, barely seeing the confused look on her girlfriend's face before she elaborates. “I've been talking about that a lot in counseling. About finding happiness and how it's never permanent, but it's important to find a balance so we can all be at least content with the life we live, despite the adversities.” 

Toni smiles and Cheryl knows what that smile means, she's been seeing a lot of those lately. ‘It's been good for you, Cher.’ She's heard that at least ten times these past weeks ever since she started counseling, and she can see the pride irradiating from the girl as she says it. Cheryl would be lying if she said that pride isn't a predominant part of the reason why she keeps attending the sessions. 

“Counseling has been fine.” Cheryl sighs, admitting that with a bit of a struggle, she can almost see the victorious smile on Toni’s face. “It’s been helping me understand grief and deal with some emotions.”

“You’re feeling better, then…?”

Well, the constant buzz in her head has been less frequent, she doesn’t really feel like she’s going to lose Toni whenever her girlfriend is out of her sight anymore, and Penelope has been… present… sometimes… when she’s too overwhelmed, or worried, or sad - basically, whenever she feels too much -… but her appearances are not as terrifying as they used to be. Also, the most recent worry she’s acquired is going to be settled as soon as she turns eighteen and gets her inheritance as a Blossom - she’ll pay Toni’s medical debts and they won’t need to lose their minds over that anymore -.

“It's hard not to be, with such a gorgeous girl by my side.” She answers, instead of listing all the issues that are constant in her life, but that are being slowly taken down with each counseling session she attends. 

“Flattery will get you…” Toni says, and Cheryl feels the pink haired girl lean forward, brushing their noses together with a giggle. “Wherever you want, baby.”

“You're talking as if I didn’t know that, mon trésor.”

“You know me too well.” Toni smiles and locks their lips together. When she pulls her head back, she says after a content sigh. “Answering your question, I am happy, Cher. I didn’t really have a fortunate life when it comes to money and blood family, but I can say it was definitely compensated by all my friends and the Serpents, the family I chose.” Cheryl nods at that answer, ready for her girlfriend’s next words. "What about you, Cher? Are you happy?”

Cheryl thinks for a moment. For a good moment. Just like she did during her counseling session that afternoon after that question was made. Once again she thinks about her life as a kid, as Jason’s shadow, then her life as a teen, the HBIC ever since she can remember, she ponders if what she’d felt back then was happiness or just relief for having her twin brother by her side, for not being completely alone and thrown to the wolfs - at the age of nine, she used to imagine her life as an only child, had Jason not been born, if she would be drowned in the Blossom’s distaste for her or if she would rise above it all and be the golden child. She feels guilty for that now that Jason’s not there anymore, because, no matter what, he was her only light for a long time -. 

When Jason died, Cheryl felt like she would never be happy again - had she ever been really happy before, even when Jason was alive? She doesn’t think much about that -. Then came Teresa, and her little dysfunctional foster family, with unconditional care and support, then Toni with softness and love, then the Serpents with the best people she’s ever had the chance to meet. 

She knows the answer to that question.

“I'm the happiest I’ve ever been, Antoinette Topaz.” She says, and Toni pulls her closer and holds her tighter, kissing her lips one more time, then her cheeks, and her forehead, and every inch of her face, until Cheryl can do nothing but giggle and pull back, seeing the purest smile on her girlfriend’s face, illuminated by the moonlight.

“And I plan to make you the happiest girl on Earth, Cheryl Blossom.”

Cheryl knows she’s telling the truth. 

Love. It’s definitely simple when you’re with the right person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) 
> 
> Bye Bye


End file.
